Recorded in the beautiful home office of Chateau' Relaxo, FL.
Let’s open this month with something most of us can relate to.A Qantas, and why is Qantas spelled Q-A-N-T-A-S and not Q-U-A-N-T-A-S? A Qantas flight attendant puts on her flight attendant uniform for the first time in 18 months. Erin Camilleri was furloughed in March of 2020 and earlier this month was called back to work and her uniform still fit. The Tik-Tok video shows the pure joy on Erin’s face.I know I can relate, as last September was the first time I had put on dress clothes since March and after 6 months of elastic pants and dressing from the waist up, it was abit dicey.So if you haven’t tried on your 2020 dress pants or tried to button up a dress shirt in order to wear a tie I suggest you do it now so that you’re not faced with having to drop 20 pounds overnight.
When it comes to air travel there are several “You had one job” opportunities, such as -
* Make sure there’s enough fuel.
* Make sure you land at the correct airport.
* And of course one of the best examples of “You had one job”…. Don’t crash.
Maybe I should have used the word requirements and not opportunities?
One that never occurred to me…. Make sure everyone has a seat. Dateline - Charleston, South Carolina. A Delta flight on its way to Atlanta pushed back from the gate – with more passengers on board than seats. The Boeing 737-900 has 180 passenger seats, but there were 182 passengers on board.Jake Hake posted on Twitter - that the aircraft pushed back – and then two passengers walked to the front of the aircraft. A “flight attendant came over the PA and mentioned two passengers on board didn’t have seats and we’d need to go back to the gate to let them off,” he explained.Get this, not fights, no arguments, just a short delay of the flight.
And then there are times when your “One job” becomes your “Last job”. For example, In 2016, a suicide bomber with explosives in his laptop boarded a Daallo Airlines flight, intending to destroy the aircraft. Twenty minutes after takeoff, the explosives detonated, blasting a hole in the plane, and instantly sucking the bomber out. He was the only fatality
An additional “You had one job” related to airplanes is this….. When a plane is sitting on the tarmac make sure to keep it level, aka keep all of the landing gear on the ground… sounds simple right? Apparently not, Mid-September a United flight landed in Idaho, and during disembarkation, the plane tilted backward coming to rest on its tail section. The official statement from United - “United flight 2509 flying from Los Angeles, California to Lewiston, Idaho landed without incident. Due to a shift in weight and balance during the offloading process, the tail of the aircraft tipped backward. No injuries were reported among our customers, crew, or ground personnel. The return flight was on a different aircraft as originally planned.”This was a failure of balance, a basic foundation of physics.Most of us have experienced this phenomenon on the playground teeter-totter. Your teeter-totter partner’s ADD takes hold and they decide to go play kickball and bail on you, and suddenly your side of the teeter-totter comes crashing to the ground.Now here’s something I never knew.
Many planes require a tail stand, which is used to “prop up” or reinforce the aircraft’s tail during the loading and unloading of cargo. Seems like a tail stand Seems like this would’ve come in real handy Mid-September in Idaho.
What is your definition of wealth? The reason I ask is that everyone has their own definition. For some it’s paying, last month’s rent or electric bill. It could be paying cash for an upcoming vacation. A second home a fourth car. For others, it might involve paying it forward and taking care of someone besides yourself.There’s no right or wrong answer. However, when you’re heavily monied, when you exist in that rarified air you can do some really crazy stuff. Like you can book the entire Business Class cabin of an Air India Airbus A320. Book all 12 seats, not for you and your crew, not you and your family but for your snowy white Maltese pup.This was roughly a two-hour flight between Mumbai and Chennai (chuh·nai).Time to queue the Sarah McLachlan music, how much did this cost? Right around $3,4000 US. That’s it $34000.00 to secure the entire Business Class cabin’s on an Air India flight.Because I’m such a mallet head I really didn’t think that $3400.00 was that bad of a deal. 12 business class seats costing right around $285.00 each. Not that bad of a deal till went on Air India’s website and found that the most expensive one-way ticket for a single seat on a flight from Mumbai to Chennai was $170.00 US. Now we have two highly trained very sophisticated dogs here at Chateau’ Relaxo, A yellow “Meth Lab” and probably the most practical dog for Florida a Siberian Husky, and even if I could afford it, which I can’t I would not book the two of them the entire cabin on any flight. Hope you had a hell of a trip pup.
Early 2021 I predicted that this would be the year of the anti-maskers vs. the vaxxers when it came to air travel. And the staff here at Back Again And Gone does a pretty good of keeping up with all of those altercations…. So here’s the Cliff Notes from September.
* Early September, Spirit Airlines passengers brawl inside Detroit Metro Airport.
* September 11th - A man and his wife did not adhere to the face mask policy and were kicked off a flight from Fort Lauderdale (Thank You Florida) to San Diego after yelling at flight attendants before takeoff.
* September 14th - Passenger Kicked Off Flight For Her Trump Mask. But That’s Not All It Said. Thank you View From the Wing. A passenger says she was kicked off of an Alaska Airlines flight because she wore a “Trump 2020” mask. She claims she was “wearing a Trump mask” but the airline says that’s not all that it said, the mask also said “F- your feelings.”. BUt wit it gets better, according to Alaska Airlines this isn’t the first time she’s given employees grief over complying with their – and federal – mask rules, she’s been formally warned before, and F-bomb dropping masks aren’t going to fly.
* September 17th, again View From The Wing. Anti-Maskers Kicked Off Delayed Flight, nothing new anti-maskers and a delayed flight. Weigh in where you want on masks, but I’m here to tell you that delayed flights suck. All of us have someplace to get to…. None of us wake up and head to the airport, to board a plane because we have nothing better to do…. If we did we’d book the whole business class on an Air India flight to a destination that I still can’t pronounce. So the anit-maskers got kicked off, no violence, thankfully…. However, they were serenaded with “Na Na Na Na, Hey Hey Goodbye”. Extra points for creativity on this one.
* Speaking of creativity check this next one out. New Excuse To Not A Wear Mask: Menopause + Fear Of Flying? And what does Menopause + Fear Of Flying equal? Removal from the plane in handcuffs in a wheelchair. Live and Let Fly posted the blow-by-blow and of course, Menopause Mary managed to post a Tik-Tok video.
* On September 24th a Hawaiian Airlines flight, Honolulu to Hilo flight had to return to the gate due to an unruly passenger. Not an anti-masker or vaxxer incident just your run-of-the-mill unruly passenger.
* Again, on September 24th on another Hawaiian Airlines flight, Honolulu to Seattle was forced to return due to an anti-masker.That ends this months installment of……. Will my flight be delayed?
Here’s a quick Anti-MASK UPDATE - The federal government will double the fines charged against passengers who refuse to wear face masks onboard aircraft, President Joseph Biden said on Thursday, September 9TH.TSA added that fines will range from $500 for first-time offenses to $3,000 for repeat offenders, effective Friday, September 10.It’s rare we get political but, if you fly you will have to wear a mask.
I have a pretty good BS detector, one that has been refined over 30+ years in the corporate world. So make what you will of this next story from View From The Wing.A passenger took to Twitter, of course, to report on a “maskless passenger” who “drank a 750ml bottle of liquor” on the plane. Here’s where the BS detector starts to kick as I ask…. HOW?
* The TSA won’t allow you to get a 750ml bottle through security.
* Most airports don’t offer full bottle sales. Possibly he had an empty bottle found a bar order 16 shots and then carefully poured them into the bottle.
* Duty-free shops do sell full bottles of liquor but they typically require you to have an international ticket in order to purchase one.
* And somehow I’m thinking that slamming a full bottle of booze in such a short amount of time would result in alcohol poisoning at a minimum
Here’s where the BS meter climbs. This was an American Airlines flight from Richmond to Philadelphia. Serviced by the regional carrier Piedmont with an ERJ-145 regional jet. The picture posted on Twitter is of a 737 and not a regional jet.And of course, the Twitter post added this - the passenger was asked to put a mask on 15+ times in 2 hours.Make what you will of the story I just think if it was true I’d be all over the news or at least TMZ.
Let’s wrap up with another business development scenario The year is 2003 you’re the owner or part-owner of a very successful nationwide chain of restaurants. To go hand-in-hand with the restaurant you sell a very successful calendar that spotlighted your employees. In the late 80’s you started a TV show, Nite Owl Theater that featured a movie of the week. Your T-shirts, branded with your logo and mascot are worn by the young as well as the old. You also sponsor a fairly successful NASCAR team, in addition to helping to fund woman’s golf in the coming years. For the most part, you’re smart or surround yourself with people even smarter.
So here’s the business devolvement scenario - Open a net new business not related to your current highly successful business, and manage to lose 40 million dollars in under 3 years - so what do you do?
If you’re Hooters, yes that Hooters, you start your very own airline and call it Hooters Air. Hooters Air was based in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, and flew to 15 destinations around the United States. Flights were right around $130.00 one way. The planes were nothing more than flying billboards for the restaurants. The planes not only had flight attendants but also had Hooters Servers dressed in the Hooter waitress uniforms.One of their destinations was Myrtle Beach, and at the time we were doing a lot of business there and it was a race to see which of us could be the first to not only fly Hooters Air but submit an expense report that had both a meal receipt from Hooters as well as a receipt from Hooters Air.3 years and $40 million dollars later Hooters air closed their cockpit door and shut down. All joking aside Hooters Air was the real deal, what led to their demise was the fact that 9/11 was just a few years prior and people were still hesitant to fly. The other contributing factor was there was a huge jet fuel price increase during this time, and when you’re positioned as a flat rate discount carrier price increases hit the bottom line…. hard.That does it, the September crazy travel roundup.…. If you want detailed show notes, links and pictures head over to podpage.com/travel-stories/
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As I always say, travel safe, stay safe, and thanks for listening.
