Are you feeling embarrassed and old because you leak when you laugh, jump, or cough? Me too. And I got tired of saying no to things like group hikes or going dancing.
My guest and I are both “women of a certain age” who have found the answers to embarrassing leaks and demoralizing diapers. We’ve helped hundreds of women find freedom from bladder accidents. Today, we’re going to give you the five basic tools to bring your bladder back from the brink.
Thanks for reading The Midlife Reset - Sleep, Strength and Joy for Women 50+! This post is public so feel free to share it.
By the time you’re done with this podcast, you’ll be able to confidently ask your healthcare team for the support you need to start rehabbing your plumbing.
Welcome to Episode 44 of the Midlife Reset Podcast. I’m your host, Cheryl Gordon. I’m a yoga therapist and mindfulness coach, and today, we’re going to bring clarity to why your pelvic floor bottoms out in midlife—and share the astonishingly simple answers that help you get your confidence back.
Please welcome my guest, Kim Wenger-Hall, from Flourishing Third Wellness. She’s a fellow yoga teacher, certified health coach, and artist specializing in pelvic floor health, chair yoga, and art therapy. She’s dedicated the last ten years to educating women about their pelvic floor. Rooted in evidence-based practices, she provides tools, insights, and community to navigate aging as a vibrant, expansive chapter—not a countdown of years, but a celebration of what’s possible. Welcome, Kim! I’m really pumped to have this conversation.
Kim: I am too! I’m a little nervous—it’s only my second podcast ever.
Cheryl: Well, welcome!
Kim: Thank you.
Cheryl: Now, we promised listeners that we’re going to deliver five things many people don’t know about keeping their plumbing bouncy and responsive. Such an important topic, right?
Kim: Yes! It’s really remarkable. I never thought I’d focus so much of my work on pelvic floor health, but honestly, 90% of the traffic on my website, my classes, and my courses is about pelvic floor health—mostly incontinence. Never in my wildest dreams did I think my high school classmates would be seeing post after post about bladder leaks… but this is the conversation we need to be having. Nobody talked about this with us earlier.
The biggest takeaway I give people is that pelvic floor issues—bladder leaks, prolapse, diastasis recti, all of it—are pressure management problems. Maybe you’re loading improperly, maybe you’re not strong enough in certain areas, maybe you’re disconnected mind-to-body. It comes down to managing pressure. And when we learn to manage our stressors—both the physical ones and the emotional ones like politics, finances, relationships—it makes all the difference. There is a finite amount of pressure your pelvic floor can withstand.
Cheryl: And we’re going to look at this today through a yoga lens, which doesn’t get talked about nearly enough. I’ve had other guests speak about hormones or pelvic floor physiotherapy, but today we’re focusing on yoga—holistic, integrated, whole-body.
1. Thoracic Spine Mobility
Cheryl: First thing—and hardly anyone talks about this—is your thoracic spine. That middle part of your back around the shoulder blades. Why is that so important for what’s going on “down south”?
Kim: Great question. Think about the diaphragm up here and the pelvic floor down here. As we inhale, the diaphragm drops and the pelvic floor softens and lengthens. They manage pressure together in three dimensions.
Wherever the breath can’t expand, the pressure has to go somewhere. The body will always prioritize breathing—if we stop breathing, we die. So if your upper back is tight, the body compensates: shoulders creep up, ribs flare out, low back strains, or we round forward more just to get a breath in.
As we age, we tend to round forward. The vertebrae usually shrink on the front side, which leads to that classic “old lady hunchback.” Many of us even developed this posture as teenagers if we were trying to hide our breasts.
Cheryl: And now we spend hours at desks, which restricts our diaphragm and affects pelvic floor movement. So what’s the fix?
Kim: Building resilience in the thoracic spine. We need mobility in the shoulder blades and mobility in the thoracic spine. That includes chest strength, subscapular strength, and bringing the head back in space—something we’ll talk about shortly.
Cheryl: So something like cat-cow is great for this?
Kim: Yes, absolutely. Simple yoga postures make a big difference.
2. Core Strength—But Not Sit-Ups
Cheryl: Okay, the second thing people get confused about: core strength. Why is it so important for pelvic floor function? And what about sit-ups?
Kim: No! No sit-ups.
Cheryl: Sit-ups are stupid, right?
Kim: They only work the rectus abdominus—the six-pack—and they pull us forward. They don’t access the obliques or the transversus abdominuis, the wrap-around muscles that provide diagonal support and stability. And when we aggressively cinch the belly in—navel to spine—the diaphragm can’t move. So the pelvic floor gets confused and overloaded with pressure.
Cheryl: And that’s when the pelvic floor gives out.
Kim: Exactly. Instead, find core engagement that still allows the diaphragm and ribs to move. Breath first, then core. My favourite cue is “waistline back” instead of “navel to spine.” You can still breathe into that.
Everything becomes core work—plank, downward dog, chaturanga, even standing poses—when we allow gentle engagement paired with breath.
3. Forward Head Posture (Texting Head)
Cheryl: Let’s get into texting head. Forward head posture. Why does this affect the pelvic floor?
Kim: Everything is connected. Fascia wraps around the entire body. The spine functions best in its natural curves. When the head drops forward—even just 11 pounds of weight out of alignment—the whole core tank. The body has to compensate to keep us from falling forward. Often that compensation comes from the low back or hip flexors.
Cheryl: In yoga, we cue people to align the head with the spine, but I often see people in forward folds letting the head drop and losing their natural curves. So one simple fix is: keep your head aligned as you move.
Kim: Exactly. When the head moves out of alignment, pressure management goes out the window.
4. Pelvic Tilt
Cheryl: On to pelvic tilt. What’s going on here?
Kim: Neutral pelvis is when the front hip points are in line with the pubic bone. Anterior tilt—we’re spilling forward, crunching the low back. Posterior tilt—the femurs jam forward, glutes grip, everything clenches. Either way, the pelvic floor gets confused.
Cheryl: The high-heeled posture is classic anterior tilt. Pregnancy often exaggerates posterior tilt. Neither one is mountain pose.
Kim: Exactly. Notice your pelvis in yoga poses. Are you dipping forward in a lunge? Tucking under in standing poses? Either habit limits breath and core function. It’s not that you can’t move into those tilts—it’s that you want to do them mindfully.
5. Nervous System State
Cheryl: And finally, number five—maybe the most important: what does my autonomic nervous system have to do with my bladder?
Kim: When we’re disconnected from our bodies and living in a state of constant stress, the brain prioritizes survival—not bladder control. If your brain thinks you’re dealing with threats—emails, money, relationships—your muscles tense, preparing to fight or flee.
One major player here is the psoas. It’s a hip flexor and postural stability muscle that shares fascial attachments with the diaphragm and travels all the way down into the thigh bone. Because of this connection, the psoas becomes deeply involved in our fight-or-flight response.
Pre-modern humans used the psoas to sprint away from danger. But today, we activate it during everyday stress—when a tense email comes in, when we’re stuck in traffic, even just sitting in the car can mimic the “ready to run” stance. Our nervous system has been practicing stress for thousands of years. It thinks, “Oh, something’s wrong? Great, I know exactly what to do!” And it holds tension—sometimes chronically.
That tension limits our body’s ability to manage pressure. Then the body gets stuck in a loop: it knows how to hold pressure, but it forgets how to let go. The muscles get tight, then tired, then confused because they’re no longer moving with the breath.
That’s why we always come back to breath. Yoga is so powerful because it’s breath-oriented—we explore a three-dimensional inhale and exhale, feeling the whole body expand and contract. Whenever that expansion can’t happen, the question becomes: What can I shift? What can I change? How can I rebalance pressure management?
That includes stress management. Am I holding my breath? Am I pulling my navel to my spine as a coping mechanism?
Am I clenching my jaw?
Cheryl: Kim, what’s your favourite yoga posture for releasing the psoas?
Kim: Probably something restorative, lying on your back.
Cheryl: Talk my language, girlfriend!
Kim: I thought you’d like that. Imagine lying over a bolster with your hips slightly elevated, and then gently letting one leg lengthen and soften toward the floor. It gives a beautiful sense of length through the psoas. A sandbag on the hip can feel wonderful too. Just make sure your pelvis is neutral or slightly tipped forward if that gives you more space.
Cheryl: I’ve got to go do that right now.
One thing I often recommend, especially if someone doesn’t have a lot of props or is short on time, is simply putting their legs up on the couch or a chair and breathing. Just letting the pelvic floor move in sync with the diaphragm and letting it do its job.
Resources:
The Decoder is a clickable PDF that helps women recognize signs of pelvic floor dysfunction beyond the obvious ones like incontinence, prolapse, or diastasis recti. Many people don’t realize things like tailbone pain, sitting bone pain, hip flexor tightness, or upper back stiffness can also be related. Even symptoms like pain with tampon insertion or plantar fasciitis can be connected.
Everything is connected.
This tool helps women go, “Oh, I never realized these things belong together.” You can take it right to your physical therapist and say, “Here’s what I’ve noticed—can we unravel this together?”
Cheryl: It helps you connect the dots, right?
Kim: Exactly. And that’s the good news and the bad news: everything is connected. But it all starts with breath and pressure management, just like we’ve been talking about.
Cheryl: Kim also has a 7-day pelvic floor challenge, plus amazing resources on her website for improving thoracic spine mobility—something we now know is essential for pelvic floor health.
Kim, thank you so much for sharing your wisdom, your experience, and your heart.
Kim: I love the work we do, and I’m so glad we connected. I’ve been listening to your previous guests and thinking, “Oh my goodness—everything really is connected!”
Cheryl: Share this podcast with your friends, everyone. I’ve met so many brilliant people through these conversations, and there is so much wisdom here. Kim, thank you again for joining me. I hope we can collaborate more in the future.
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