Welcome back to the Midlife Reset Podcast, episode 33! I’m your host, Cheryl Gordon. Today, we’re diving into something every midlife woman has experienced—mood swings, irritability, that sudden sense of “I can’t believe I just snapped over nothing!”
Now, I want you to know—this isn’t just in your head. It’s real, physiological, and completely normal. Hormones, stress, sleep, and even nutrition all play a role in how we feel in midlife.
By the end of this episode, you’ll understand why your moods shift, what’s happening in your brain and body, and most importantly, practical ways to regain control, feel calmer, and protect your mental wellbeing.
Let’s start with hormones—our invisible puppeteers. Around our 40s and 50s, estrogen and progesterone start to fluctuate even more wildly than normal as the ovaries slow down. Estrogen is more than just a reproductive hormone—it affects your serotonin, the “feel good” neurotransmitter. Lower estrogen can mean lower serotonin, which can trigger anxiety, irritability, sadness, or that general “ugh” feeling. If you’re feeling scattered, more anxious than you used to or just plain cranky, it’s probably because the uptake of serotonin is lower. We’re definitely more vulnerable to stress in general without that cushion.
Progesterone, on the other hand, is like the chill hormone. It helps regulate mood, calm the nervous system, and even supports sleep. So when progesterone drops, you can feel more anxious, tense, or snappy than usual. When my progesterone levels tanked in perimenopause, sleep became almost impossible overnight. We need progesterone to signal the production of melatonin, which helps us feel sleepy. The relaxation nerves don’t get the signalling they need to cue the relaxation response if progesterone is low.
And don’t forget cortisol, the stress hormone. Last week, we discussed this glucocorticoid compound in more detail so you may want to refer back to episode 32. We talked all about stress and hormones and weight gain. Good stuff.
Cortisol rises when we’re tired, overwhelmed, or stressed, and it works hand-in-hand with our sex hormones to influence mood. High cortisol + fluctuating estrogen and progesterone? That’s the recipe for emotional turbulence. Isn’t that how we feel, girlfriend, in midlife? Like we’re on a crazy roller coaster and some sadist somewhere has the stick shift.
To add insult to injury, all the running around we did to keep everyone else happy and safe created a lot of stress. This constantly stimulated the adrenals to pump out that cortisol. Rushing to get the kids on time… creating perfect holiday memories for a family of 18… worrying all day at work about your sick neighbour… all that just wore those little glands right out. Soooo, when we get to midlife, the adrenals, which should take up a little of the estrogen/progesterone production, are just offline.
Those mood swings you’re feeling? They’re not a character flaw. They’re a signal that your body is adjusting to new hormonal realities.
Now here’s the big take away!!! Hormones do their own thing without you directing them. That’s when we feel like we’re on the crazy train ride. BUT.. wait for it…. As a human with a super brain, you have the ability to wrest control back from the automatic pilot.
All the magazine articles and wellness experts advice to eat carefully, exercise more and meditate. But they don’t explain exactly how, why and really, what to do when old habits die really slow. How many times have you had those very goals every New Year’s?
Let’s dive in to what you can start now, small steps and simply, to move toward better mood and sharper focus.
Shaping hormonal responses in every day life means paying attention to your every day habits. Yup… it’s that lifestyle stuff again—sleep, movement, and nutrition— they can either amplify those mood swings or help you ride them more smoothly.
* Sleep: Poor sleep disrupts your hormones even further, lowers serotonin, and makes cortisol spikes worse. Feeling cranky after a night of tossing and turning? That’s your brain on low serotonin and high cortisol. Changing habits is super hard when you are running on empty. Stay tuned and we’ll talk strategies around this.
* Movement: Gentle exercise like yoga, walking, or strength training boosts endorphins, which balance mood. Even a 15 minute practice can start the process. The big key is consistency.
* Nutrition: Foods rich in protein, healthy fats, and fibre stabilize blood sugar, which prevents mood swings fuelled by glucose spikes and crashes. Midlife women are particularly sensitive to blood sugar fluctuations and issues with insulin. This means prioritizing planning your food, not running on empty or cutting out essential nutrients in the interest of cutting calories.
* Mindfulness & Stress Reduction: Breathing exercises, meditation, journaling—even 5 minutes a day—lower cortisol, which directly improves emotional resilience. Mindfulness won’t inspire your husband to change being sloppy. It won’t make your boss automatically kinder. It won’t get your kids to call. BUT it can shift how your body responds to these stressors, which shifts the hormones.
It’s all connected—sleep better, eat smarter, move mindfully, and your mood swings start to soften.
Now we look at making this happen in your life, as it is now. I don’t want to make any grandiose plans or resolutions that will be ditched in week two. We’ve all done that.
Here are five quick tools that build a healthier lifestyle. My suggestion is that you pick one and work on that until it’s habitual. That might take 3 days or 3 weeks. We’re all coming at this from different angles.
I mentioned earlier that habits are hard to change when we’re super tired.
The brain simply does not have the resources to process change when you’re stressed. So our first strategy should be to choose a tool that is most helpful for you to cope with stressors in your life.
Which one of these do you think will make the biggest impact and will be the easiest to adopt?
Tool 1: Mindful Check-InSpend 2–3 minutes noticing your mood without judgment. Name it. “I feel frustrated.” “I feel anxious.” Labeling emotions actually calms the brain’s amygdala and gives you space to respond, not react. (Practice 3 minute breathing space)
Tool 2: Breathwork for Immediate CalmTry this breathing method: Inhale until you fill your lungs, then inhale a little more. Exhale and sigh out the mouth. Repeat 3 x. This “double inhale” massages the heart a little extra which tells your nervous system it’s safe to relax.
Tool 3: Movement as Mood ResetEven a short walk outside or a gentle yoga stretch can shift cortisol, boost serotonin, and reset your mood. Bonus: sunlight exposure early in the day helps regulate melatonin for better sleep. We mentioned earlier that even 15 minutes/day is an effective dose. Try these quick stretches with me right now. (Side bend, twist, cat/cow)
Tool 4: Blood Sugar AwarenessEat protein at every meal and limit refined carbs. Keeping your blood sugar stable stabilizes your mood. Midlife women often overlook this, but it makes a huge difference. Research is suggesting that an active midlife woman might need 90 grams or more protein per day. Aim to find whole food sources rather than protein drinks and supplements. Lovingly feeding your body makes your nervous system very happy. Mindful Eating is a great practice and I have a free guide to get you started. There will be a link in the show notes.
Tool 5: Self-Compassion
If people heard the vicious commentary running in my head some days, they would be shocked! I can be really mean to myself. During my weight loss and using the SHE Mindfulness program, I learned to recognize and reframe a lot of that self critical thinking. You know what I found really helped? Placing my hands over my heart, like this, closing my eyes briefly and saying something comforting to myself. Like you would to a small child or pet who was upset. Let’s try it cuz I know it sounds too basic.
Here’s an important mindset shift: mood swings aren’t a weakness—they’re your body talking to you. They’re asking for rest, movement, nutrition, or emotional care. If we listen instead of resist, we can reduce their frequency and intensity.
Pema Chodron says that what we resist will keep coming back to visit us until we let it in. Some of teachers say “what we resist, persists”.
Think of it like tuning an instrument. Hormones, stress, and lifestyle factors are the strings. When one is off, everything sounds discordant. With attention, mindfulness, and practical strategies, you can bring yourself back in tune.
So today we talked about why midlife mood swings happen, the role of hormones and cortisol, and simple tools to help you feel steadier and happier.
If you’re ready to take the next step, I have a free Mindful Eating Guide that pairs beautifully with these strategies, helping you nourish your body without stress or guilt. It’s all about small, kind, consistent steps—perfect for midlife women. There is also the Sleep Solutions Course ($19) that expands some of these self care tools, especially ones you can use in the middle of the night.
And if this episode resonated with you, share it with a friend who might need a little extra support, and subscribe so you never miss an episode of the Midlife Reset Podcast.
Remember: your moods don’t define you, but the way you respond to them can empower you to thrive through midlife and beyond.
