Good evening friends,
Does anyone else feel like the demands on our time is getting worse?
I’m not sure if this has anything to do with the Covid-19 rules being relaxed but it feels like the busy dial is being turned up to 11.
The quietness we experienced in the middle of the pandemic is a growing distant memory, replaced by the hustle and bustle of the new normal.
Previously empty diaries are now being filled with appointments, meetings and social gatherings at incredible speed.
It won’t be long before (sadly) we forget all the lessons learned during the pandemic. But as we transition into life post the pandemic, how we approach situations can make a big difference.
Not only in terms of success or failure but how it affects our mental state.
Fortunately, there is a simple life hack which will allow an unfair advantage; one that we can all use.
Lightbulb Moment
As is often the case, it’s the small changes that make a big impact.
* A switch in methods.
* A shift in approach.
* A change in mindset.
Doesn’t mean it’s easy though.
The ideals we hold and the desire to achieve can quickly be undone by the daunting size of the task ahead.
It can be easy to fall into the trap of defaulting to negativity.
Let’s take trying to instil new habits as an example.
With it being January, it is a very topical conversation.
If getting fit or becoming healthier is your goal, it is highly likely you will need to commit to an exercise regime. Exercising might not fill you with excitement, especially if the gym is not your natural environment (which is entirely understandable by the way!)
This may lead us to viewing a situation in a negative manner. I would go as far as saying, we may even perceive this action to be a chore.
We know it will be a drain on our energy.
But what if could turn this frown upside down and make it a positive experience?
It can be done.
It is possible.
You may be thinking I’m smoking my socks here but bear with me.
Let’s quickly go back to school and sit in a maths lesson. Do you remember the equation for how fast something is going?
Here’s a hint: it’s a triangle.
* Got it yet?
* Need a few more mins?
Ok, here we go…
To calculate the speed of an object, we need to divide the distance travelled by the time it took. The triangle was a wonderful way of helping us remember how to calculate the distance, speed and time of an object or situation.
The reason for telling you this is that we can use an equation to help reframe our mental approaches to situations.
By reframing a situation we can reap huge rewards.
So taking the same approach, let’s consider how we can improve an outcome. We shall use the same mathematical equation but this time using the letters E, R & O.
* E = Event
* R = Response
* O = Outcome
By making the outcome the focus, we arrange the letters in the following formula:
* E + R = O
If the outcome is the element we want to change i.e., negatively viewing the exercise, we need to address the event and the response.
In this example, the event will be going to the gym and the response will be perceiving it is a chore.
In establishing habits, it is important to only change one thing at once.
(Tweet This)
With this in mind, we will only change one of either the event or the response. And whilst we could avoid the gym, we know it will be the best way to improve our fitness, so we keep that the same.
The other aspect is therefore, our response - rather than perceiving it as a negative i.e., a chore, we can shift this to a positive position by changing one word.
When we talk about going to the gym, I willing to bet you would say:
“I have to go to the gym 3 times this week to get fit.”
The word I want to change here is ‘have’.
Have is a small yet hugely influential 4 letter word. We may not realise it but have has negative connotations.
* I have to go to work tomorrow
* I have pick the kids up from school
* I have to go to the gym
These are factually correct but imply this action is a chore. But what if we replaced ‘have’ with ‘get’…?
* I get to go to work tomorrow
* I get to pick the kids up from school
* I get to go to the gym
It turns the emphasis on its head.
All of a sudden, there is a positive flavour emanating from the sentences. One little word has completely changed the essence of the action.
And that’s what I find so fascinating.
Yes going to the gym can be a chore, but how much better does it sound with ‘get to’ rather than ‘have to’. There is a positivity associated with it.
It is a privilege.
You get to work out because you are focusing on improving your health. You get to pick up the kids because you have made this a priority. You get to go to work tomorrow as you want to help others (ok I admit, the work example may not work so well, but you know what I mean!)
This is simple hack we can all adopt.
That’s not to say it’s easy.
Changing ones mindset is easy to say but hard to do.
In fact, I had this week with this newsletter! I thought to myself, I have to write my next Lightbulb Moment, quickly falling into the trap of implying it is a chore.
Taking a second to reframe this thought, I said to myself:
“hold on, I get to write this knowledge bomb filled newsletter. I love passing on knowledge, sharing what I know and (hopefully) helping others. This isn’t a chore, it’s a privilege.”
And that’s the key.
Remembering what we are able to do helps us stay positive and, in turn, increase the likelihood of success.
It won’t happen overnight but we will get there.
So with that, I’m off to FaceTime my parents as I’m fortunate that I get to speak to them each week.
Have a good evening,
-Bren
