*heads up* at marker 2:08-2:49 my kid comes in and there’s a little side moment. feel free to skip that if you want.
welcome back to said out loud—the podcast where we say the things out loud, even when they’re weird, slightly unhinged, or kind of uncomfortable.
hi hello how are you, so glad you’re here!
i’ve been thinking about this line i heard recently—
“if the devil can’t tempt you with sin, he’ll distract you with busyness.”
and honestly? that one hit.
life’s been moving way too fast lately.
not necessarily in a big, dramatic way… just in that nonstop, “who even runs this house?” kind of way.
laundry, groceries, work, kids, cleaning up after pets, trying to be a good partner, a good mom, a good human, and still find time to create something that matters.
i’m tired. not just in my body. tired in my soul.
a friend of mine recently took two weeks off social media.
like—really off. no posting, no scrolling, no content, no pretending.
and it made me wonder… could i do that too? should i?
this morning i sat in the living room for a minute—sunlight coming through the window—and i opened my bible. and then i opened my son’s kids devotional because honestly? sometimes that one hits harder. the simplicity, the clarity. no commentary or debate—just, here’s the truth.
i’ve been reading through the story of joseph again.
and wow… i forgot how much is packed in there.
it’s basically a whole netflix series. betrayal, loss, waiting, growth, redemption.
but what’s standing out to me most right now is the way joseph moved through it all—
not just what happened, but how he trusted anyway.
how he didn’t always understand, but he stayed open.
how god was still working behind the scenes even when it looked like nothing was happening.
meanwhile, i’ve been caught up in the grind.
comparing myself to everyone.
feeling behind.
feeling like i’m never doing enough.
feeling like i’m not even sure what the point is anymore.
like martha in the bible—always doing instead of just being.
i think the hardest part is knowing i want to help people.
i want to give freely. support causes i care about. buy meaningful gifts. sponsor things. show up for people financially.
but right now i can’t. and that’s hard.
especially with mia.
i think about her future more than anything else.
who will take care of her when i’m gone?
what will she need? how do i make sure her life is safe and supported?
will cooper be okay with that?
how much will it all cost?
and yet…
i keep thinking back to april and may, when i was pushing for district manager.
i felt focused then. anchored.
and now? i feel like i’m flailing again.
but maybe that’s the point of reading joseph right now.
maybe god’s reminding me:
you don’t need to control everything.
you just need to trust again.
ok that’s all i got for now
love ya mean it
catch ya next time
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