Welcome back to Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown! Today we recap Breaker High, episode 20: “Squall’s Well That Ends Well.”
Looks like this will be another all-on-ship episode; if you couldn’t guess from the title, Captain Ballard and Tony confirm it when discussing how they need to avoid some rough weather before heading to port, but after having been at sea for two weeks the kids are starting to go a little stir-crazy.
We are really pulling out all the character stereotypes this episode. Ashley is upset that she’s starting to run out of hair product, Alex bumbles his way through trying to make her feel better, and Jimmy’s unhygienic habits are on full display.
Denise and Cassidy seem to be having some roommate issues. Seeing only a crumpled up piece of paper with “I <3 Brad Pitt” on it, Denise didn’t recognize Cassidy’s history notes so threw them away when tidying the room, and also erased Cassidy’s “date grid” from her whiteboard to have a space to leave a note that Cassidy’s mom called. Now who will Cassidy know who she’s going out with on Friday? When Denise responds, “Probably both guys,” Cassidy takes that as jealousy.
Tamira had borrowed Denise’s history notes, which Denise then promised to Cassidy after the “throwing away” incident, but Tamira accidentally ruined Denise’s notes too. How are they supposed to study now?
The students are supposed to be attending a lifeboat drill in advance of the upcoming storm, but Ashley skips it in favor of a face mask and hot rollers. Gonna guess this is going to come back to bite her.
Ms. Mitchell tells Captain Ballard that Max has missed three classes this week, and the captain’s first response is to sigh and say, “And here I thought Max was starting to make an effort,” instead of wondering if something’s wrong. I know they’re used to him being a troublemaker, but jumping to conclusions still ain’t it.
Max comes to see his dad in the ship’s cockpit, but at that point it’s too late for a conversation - the storm is here. After Captain Ballard calls for all students to head to the cafeteria or coffeehouse immediately, Alex goes to Ashley’s room to try and pry her out, but she’s still in the middle of taking out her curlers and scraping off her mask. The captain then gives the order to seal all non-essential areas (of course thinking the students are gathered together) and says they could be looking at a hurricane - better hurry, Ashley and Alex.
The cafeteria’s power goes out, which means no unnecessary appliances can be used, which means Nigel won’t be cooking, which means Jimmy is distraught.
Alex and Ashley reach the door to the hallway and it’s locked - they’re officially sealed in and we might have ourselves a Titanic moment. For now, they head back to Ashley’s cabin.
“All hands on deck” is being taken literally now, and Captain Ballard has Max man the radar station. Hope he’s picked something up from watching his dad over the years, because that’s a lot of pressure.
Captain Ballard goes over the intercom again to tell everyone to put their lifejackets on if they haven’t already. Ashley complains about how the Day-Glo orange clashes with her hair, and Alex has had it. “I don’t just like you because you’re beautiful. You’re also smart and funny - you have a lot of good things going for you besides your looks, which are spectacular. In fact, you look beautiful to me right now when you’re not wearing any makeup at all.” In any other case I’d get into how that last sentece shouldn’t be a necessary statement to make, but given Ashley’s pageant background, for her it truly is affirming.
Everyone in the cafeteria is getting hungrier and hungrier when Jimmy remembers he happens to have a hidden food stash in there. He tosses bags of cheese puffs and other snacks to the thrilled students and faculty. As everyone chows down, their worries go back to making it through the storm and surprising confessions emerge - Sean accidentally shares he’s never kissed a girl, and Denise sometimes actually likes it when guys hold the door open for her.
Back in the cabin, Ashley confirms her insecurities to Alex: “Growing up, all I ever heard was ‘Dress properly; look your best.’ I was under constant pressure.” And before an injury, so was Alex with sports. While they have that commonality, Ashley takes it to a whole new level. She says, “I tried going out without makeup once. It was the worst six minutes of my entire life. It felt like everyone was staring at me,” (apparently it was different from the stares she got because people thought she was pretty). Ashley then realizes she’s scared, so Alex kisses her to distract her, and with her enthusiastic consent they continue. When we fade back in, they are still clothed, asleep but holding hands.
Breaker High has made it through the storm! Tamira’s figured out a plan for borrowing another student’s notes, and Denise did some asking around to confirm who Cassidy is going out with each day that weekend (and reminds her to call her mom).
After his performance during the storm, Captain Ballard tells Max he’d be happy to have him on his bridge anytime 🥲 (though of course that also has to include a “Start going to class!”). Max smiles and salutes in response - maybe he’ll take after his old man after all.
To end the episode, Alex and Ashley kiss on deck - looks like they might be official :D.
Don’t change that channel! We’ll be right back on Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown.
