Reconciliation: Not an Impossible Dream
Reconciliation isn’t an impossible dream. As followers of Christ, it’s a path we can walk with others in the world—a journey that begins at a table.
What Can We Learn from Church History About Reconciliation?
The Church of the Brethren has a story marked by fracture and pain. With 36 schisms or church splits throughout its history, it reveals the struggle of trying to stay faithful to Jesus while walking together.
Even in the earliest days, leaders like Conrad Beissel made bold turns that created division. When he prized spirit-breathed revelation over Scripture, it birthed the Ephrata Cloister but also opened a wound in the church. Yet beauty surfaced from this experience—music and art found voice among the sisters and brothers there. God continued working through imperfect people on both sides.
Throughout history, disputes continued over practices we now take for granted:
* The mode of foot washing
* Dress codes
* “Dangerous innovations” like Sunday school
In 1869, some Brethren pleaded for uniformity (not unity), fearing the church was becoming worldly. The church wrestled, talked, prayed, sometimes split, but always grew through these experiences.
How Does Christ’s Reconciliation Shape Our Mission?
If Christ reconciles the world to God, what are we called to do as co-laborers in this reconciliation?
A profound 1979 statement reminds us: “Unity is a gift, not an achievement. Christ at the center makes disagreements bearable.”
We must recenter ourselves on Jesus—not on tribes, not on our views, not on our way, but on Christ’s way.
What Biblical Examples Guide Our Approach to Conflict?
Paul and Barnabas had “no small dispute”—they were fighting! They disagreed so much that they parted ways. Yet importantly, they blessed each other’s missions despite their separation.
In Corinth, believers loved leaders over the Lord, prompting Paul’s rhetorical question: “Has Christ been divided?” The answer is clearly no.
Jesus gave us a path to address conflict in Matthew 18:
* Go first
* Go gently
* Go together
* Win back the sibling, not the argument
Romans 14 opens an even wider gate—welcoming differences of conscience without contempt, choosing intentionally what builds up rather than tears down.
What Practical Steps Can We Take Toward Reconciliation?
Here are seven practical commitments—one for each day:
1. Covenant of Conversation
In our homes and committees, commit to no gossip, no triangulation, and quick repair. Seek first to understand the other before anything else.
2. Commitment to Spacious Conscience
Hold convictions with humility, recognizing that perspectives change as life happens. Make room at the table for both the “weak” and the “strong.”
3. Matthew 18 Rhythm of Life
Go directly to others, then add wise counsel if needed, involving the church only when necessary—always seeking restoration over removal.
4. Practice Lowliness
Foot washing trains our hearts to go low in service and humility. The towels we use soften our words before we speak.
5. Shared Discernment in Scripture
Read with Jesus Christ at the center. Let love shape how truth is carried among us and out into the world.
6. Blessings Across Differences
When paths diverge, refuse contempt and criticism. Speak peace, pray for good, and always leave the door open.
7. Repair as Public Witness
Our communities need reconcilers everywhere—at work, schools, and in neighborhoods. Let apologies be fast and amends be real.
How Can We Practice Reconciliation Daily?
Here’s a simple rule of life: First listen, then love, then speak. The only time to reverse that order is when you want to bless someone.
Unity isn’t forced—it’s given. We don’t create the body; we receive it. Christ is not divided, and neither are we. When we fail (and we will), we fail forward into mercy, returning to the table that returns us to each other.
What Would Reconciliation Look Like in Practice?
Imagine the church our children would inherit if we practiced these principles:
* Disagreement without disdain
* Truth without trampling
* Holiness without hurry
Imagine our neighbors’ surprise: “Those Brethren disagree, but they won’t let go of each other. They argue, then have coffee together. What’s up with that?”
That’s the gospel with skin on it. That’s the net not breaking.
Life Application
This week, identify one tension you’re carrying and schedule one brave, kind conversation about it. As you approach this conversation:
* Center on Christ first, not on being right
* Practice lowliness and humility in your approach
* Guard peace with “fierce gentleness”
* Speak truth, but always in love
* Hold Christ highly and hold onto others desperately
Ask yourself:
* Where am I prioritizing my viewpoint over relationship?
* How can I listen first, love second, and speak third in my difficult conversations?
* What would it look like to “fail forward into mercy” in my current conflicts?
* How might my reconciliation efforts serve as a witness to those watching?
Remember: Let the towel of service be your teacher and let the table of communion be your testimony.
