If you read these notes instead of listening to, or watching the podcast, thank you so much for being here! But you are missing so much! For example in the podcast I go into detail this week on how to adopt the practice of a nightly examine, but it’s barely mentioned here in these notes. I invite you to get the full experience by listening to the podcast.
🌿 Virtue Description
Sorrow for sins, or compunctio, is the interior disposition of regret and contrition over sin, exercised in hope for divine mercy and the restoration of righteousness.
St. Thomas Aquinas (ST II-II, Q87) teaches that this sorrow for sin perfects the will by enabling us to confront moral failings with humility, turning regret into reform and greater vigilance.
The steps of a good confession:
* An honest examination of conscience
* Sorrow for sin
* A firm purpose of amendment
* Confession
* Penance
Contrition nurtures hope by coupling awareness of sin with confidence in God’s mercy. It cultivates humility, prudence, and sincere self-awareness, which is essential to growing in virtue and trust.
⚠️ Vice of Deficiency: Obduracy
Definition:Obduracy is the hardened refusal to feel sorrow for sin. It deadens the conscience, closing the soul to repentance and grace.
Why it fits:Contrition opens the heart to conversion. Obduracy shuts it down. It rationalizes guilt, resists grace, and says, “I have nothing to be sorry for,” even when grave sin is present.
Description:The obdurate heart is unyielding. It resents correction, denies guilt, and dismisses remorse as weakness. It becomes comfortable in sin, unwilling to acknowledge the wound, and calcifies the soul against healing.
Romans 2:5: “By your stubbornness and impenitent heart, you are storing up wrath for yourself...”
Obduracy is seen in Pharaoh (Ex 7:13) and those who resist even the clear call to repentance.
🔥 Vice of Excess: Scrupulosity
Definition:Scrupulosity is the disordered fear of sin, excessive guilt and anxiety about moral imperfection, driven by mistrust of or disbelief in God’s mercy.
Why it fits:Contrition trusts God’s forgiveness. Scrupulosity doubts it. It obsesses over details, repeats confessions, and replaces hope with fear. It mistakes anxiety for holiness.
Description:The scrupulous soul is burdened by uncertainty. It questions whether sins were confessed properly, worries about unworthiness, and often avoids communion out of fear. This vice can stem from pride (trying to be perfect) or distrust (thinking sin is greater than grace).
“Perfect love casts out fear.” (1 John 4:18)
Scrupulosity casts out love and enthrones fear. It replaces the merciful Father with an imagined judge.
St. Alphonsus Liguori and St. Ignatius of Loyola overcame this vice. Martin Luther did not. Instead of trusting God’s mercy, he abandoned Christ’s Church, hardening his heart in obduracy.
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🪞 My Life
I struggle more with the excess of scrupulosity than with obduracy. I often question my motives: Did I act out of love? Or was it self-serving? This inner questioning can blur the line between healthy contrition and anxious self-doubt.
In the podcast I discuss teaching my son about contrition to prepare for his first confession.
I use the examen from my missal and the Saint Maker planner from Sofia Institute Press.
🌍 The Secular Perspective
Our culture celebrates obduracy. No one wants to feel shame, and we glorify self-justification over repentance:
* “Love is love”
* “It’s not personal, it’s business”
* “Undocumented” instead of “illegal alien”
* Divorce parties
* Shifting personal blame to “systemic issues”
* Ironic humor to avoid confronting challenging ideas from our political opponants
We try to erase guilt rather than face it. But contrition isn’t about shame, it’s about healing. If we could admit our faults and allow others to do so without attacking them, we could find greater unity.
🌟 Example Saint: St. Peter the Apostle
Lived: ~1 BC – AD 64From: Bethsaida, Galilee
Peter denied Christ three times, then wept bitterly (Luke 22:61–62). That gaze of Jesus — loving, penetrating, devastating — is the heart of compunction.
Jesus restored Peter through love, asking three times, “Do you love me?” (John 21:15–17). Peter’s yes was no longer proud; it was contrite.
Peter’s sorrow didn’t lead to despair. It led to mission. He preached at Pentecost, led the Church, and died a martyr, crucified upside-down.
His tears became a turning point, not the end, but the beginning of holiness.
💬 Tell Me What You Think
Share your thoughts in the comments.Your reflections may be featured in future episodes when we invite guests to speak about this virtue.
✝️ Act of Contrition
O my God,I am heartily sorry for having offended Thee,and I detest all my sins because of Thy just punishments,but most of all because they offend Thee, my God,Who art all-good and deserving of all my love.I firmly resolve, with the help of Thy grace,to sin no more and to avoid the near occasions of sin.Amen
🙏 Closing Prayer
Lord, bless us with faith, hope, love, prudence, temperance, fortitude, and justice,that we may live as You intended man to live, in all virtue and righteousness.Help us to flee from sin and avoid all temptations of the world, the flesh, and the devil.Protect us with a spiritual hedge in front of us, behind us, above us, below us,to our right, to our left, within us and all around us.Seal it with the blood of Your precious Son, our Lord Jesus Christ.Help us to keep You in everything we see, think, and do.Amen.
🕊️ Go out and fill the world with virtue. Deus vult!
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