Hey folks, Jeff here, with Adjust Accordionly—Episode 16: Polka and Order!, glitter-bombing August 10-16, 2025, with news spicier than a Subway sandwich toss! Trump’s D.C. police takeover has Mayor Bowser in a tizzy, while “Shifty” Schiff’s leaks spark DOJ fire. Texas’ ICE fortress buries sanctuary city dreams, and Melania smacks Hunter’s Epstein lies. This week’s polka’s a banger, and “Before It Was Gay” is a Biden-era callback to America’s pre-woke glory. Subscribe on Substack, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, and keep the polka news rockin’!
Polka Week in Review: August 10 to 16, 2025
Polka week in review, August ten to sixteen’s news, Headlines roar, the fight’s hardcore, let’s polka through, From Trump’s DC grip, to shifty Schiff’s slip, let’s go one-two-three, Grab your accordion, let’s set it, Adjust Accordingly!
Mexico’s boss cries, ICE raids ain’t nice, dodging migrant crime’s toll, Trump grabs DC’s reins, boots Bowser’s claims, law’s under his control, CBP Chinese meat, six thousand pound cheat, diseases they could bring, ICE apps flood, one hundred K studs, Trump’s border plan’s the thing, Stocks soar high, Trump’s policies fly, big economic wins, H-1B’s cut, Indian tech’s shut, American century begins!
Week’s a blast, news moves fast, polka’s got that zing, Trump’s fight’s tight, the left’s in fright, let the tubas ring!
Hey, Trump’s DC throne, Schiff’s crimes are shown, MAGA’s breaking chains, Ho, ICE trucks roll, Dems lose control, truth exposes their games, Crush their plots, fire the shots, our spirit’s never wrong, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordingly!
Feds storm streets, Bowser’s pleas take seat, law and order’s here to stay, DC curbs kids, clears homeless grids, Trump’s order leads the way, Lefty mobs yell, subway sandwich fell, their chaos flops in shame, Trump eyes urban mess, vows to address, MAGA’s cleaning the game, Texas redraws maps, GOP slaps, Dems’ gerrymander scheme, Courts back deport, third countries’ sort, it’s a border dream!
News is wild, polka’s styled, truth’s the beat we chase, Trump’s bold stand, across the land, sets the patriot pace!
Hey, Schiff’s leaks bust, Dems eat dust, Trump’s justice takes the crown, Ho, ICE builds big, Newsom’s rigged, MAGA tears it down, Drums and brass, guitars fast pass, our polka’s never wrong, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordingly!
ICE’s Texas cage, Trump’s deportation rage, sends illegals on the run, Newsom’s map threat, Dems’ desperate bet, Trump’s still number one, Courts eye gay marriage, ADL’s smears disparage, patriotism under fire, Musk sues Apple, Melania billion crackle, Hunter’s Epstein liar, Trump hosts Putin talk, Alaska’s walk, peace deal shakes the wire, Foreign counts drop, Trump’s on top, a new American empire!
Week’s on fire, left’s in mire, polka’s call is loud, From Schiff’s dark scheme to Trump’s bold dream, troosters stand proud, With grit and might, we’ll win the fight, polka’s hearty sound, Dance to the news, accordion’s muse, let truth’s sound be found!
Hey, Trump’s DC grip, Schiff’s crimes slip, justice hunts the foe, Ho, ICE trucks hum, foreign counts plum, MAGA steals the show, Courts back deportations, Musk fights corporations, truth’s breaking through the haze, Newsom’s plots fail, Melania’s set to nail, Trump’s peace leads the days, Brass and beat, we dish the heat, our spirit’s never wrong, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordingly!
Adjust Accordingly!
News Headlines Covered: August 10 to 16, 2025
* Mexican President Slams ICE Raids, Claims U.S. Owes Success to Migrants (August 10, 2025) Mexican President lectures that ICE raids unfairly target Mexicans, who he claims fuel U.S. prosperity, dodging the chaos illegal immigration dumps on American communities.
* DC Announces Juvenile Curfew Zone in Navy Yard (August 10, 2025) DC police slap a curfew on kids under 17 in Navy Yard from August 15-18, a half-hearted attempt to curb chaos as Trump’s federal hammer looms.
* Trump Federalizes DC Police Under Home Rule Act (August 10, 2025) President Trump invokes Section 740 of the DC Home Rule Act, seizing control of DC police and deploying 800 National Guard troops to crush “crime and squalor,” despite Mayor Bowser’s whining about a 26% drop in violent crime.
* CBP Seizes 6,682 lbs of Sketchy Chinese Animal Products in LA (August 10, 2025) CBP snags 6,682 lbs of unmanifested avian, swine, and ruminant products from China, mislabeled as tilapia by a repeat offender, risking deadly animal diseases due to lax import controls.
* ICE Flooded with 100,000 Applications (August 10, 2025) ICE gets slammed with 100,000 applications, likely for enforcement or employment, showing Americans are ready to back Trump’s deportation agenda.
* Stocks Soar to Record Highs on Trump’s Economic Wins (August 10, 2025) US stock markets hit all-time highs, riding Trump’s deregulation and America First policies, despite naysayers’ gripes about “unsustainable” gains.
* Trump Banishes Obama’s Portrait to White House Backstairs (August 10, 2025) Trump moves Barack Obama’s portrait from the White House Grand Foyer to a private staircase, a fitting jab at his rival, alongside Bush portraits, shaking up tradition.
* Trump’s H-1B Visa Overhaul Targets Indian Workers (August 10, 2025) Trump’s wage-based H-1B visa overhaul squeezes Indian tech workers, putting American jobs first despite globalist complaints.
* Federal Agents Hit DC Streets in Trump’s Crime Crackdown (August 11, 2025) Federal troops and National Guard swarm DC streets under Trump’s orders, brushing off local claims of a 30-year crime low as Bowser cries “authoritarian.”
* Homeless Camps Razed in DC Cleanup (August 12, 2025) Federal and local crews bulldoze DC homeless encampments, restoring order as Trump’s federal grip tightens, despite left-wing complaints of cruelty.
* Anti-Trump Mob Chants “Trump Must Go” Outside White House (August 12, 2025) Hundreds of anti-Trump protesters swarm the White House, whining “Trump Must Go” over his DC takeover and immigration policies, met with federal muscle.
* Democrat DOJ Flunkie Fired for Sandwich Assault on Feds (August 13, 2025) A DOJ employee gets canned and slapped with felony charges for chucking a Subway sandwich at federal officers in DC, exposing Democrat “law and order” hypocrisy.
* Trump Vows to Tame Lawless Cities After DC Success (August 13, 2025) Trump promises to roll federal law enforcement into “lawless” cities like New York and Chicago post-DC, targeting crime despite local stats showing declines.
* Texas Senate Approves GOP-Favored Redistricting Map (August 13, 2025) Texas Senate passes a GOP-backed redistricting map, strengthening Republican control and countering Democrat gerrymandering schemes like Newsom’s.
* Largest ICE Detention Center to Open in Texas (August 14, 2025) ICE gears up to open a massive Texas detention center, supercharging Trump’s deportation machine and infuriating sanctuary city cheerleaders.
* Newsom Threatens Trump with California Gerrymandering (August 14, 2025) Newsom threatens to rig California’s electoral maps to thwart Trump, a desperate Democrat power grab.
* Supreme Court Eyes Challenge to 2015 Gay Marriage Ruling (August 15, 2025) The Supreme Court mulls revisiting its 2015 Obergefell ruling on gay marriage, spotlighting judicial overreach and cultural fault lines.
* ADL Smears “America First” as Antisemitic (August 15, 2025) The Anti-Defamation League brands Trump’s “America First” slogan antisemitic, a shameless attack to demonize patriotism for political points.
* Supreme Court Backs Trump’s Third-Country Deportations (August 15, 2025) The Supreme Court greenlights Trump’s plan to deport illegals to third countries, boosting his immigration crackdown.
* Indian Flag in Ohio Stirs Patriot Backlash (August 16, 2025) An Indian flag raised at an Ohio public event sparks outrage over national identity, with critics slamming the elevation of foreign symbols on American soil.
* Foreign-Born Population Plummets Under Trump (August 16, 2025) Census data shows a 2.2 million drop in the foreign-born population from January to July, a historic win for Trump’s immigration crackdown.
* Musk’s xAI Takes on Apple in App Store Lawsuit (August 16, 2025) Elon Musk’s xAI sues Apple over anti-competitive App Store practices, a bold strike against Big Tech’s stranglehold on innovation.
* Melania Demands Hunter Biden Retract Epstein Smear (August 16, 2025) Melania Trump demands Hunter Biden retract claims tying her to Jeffrey Epstein, threatening legal action over his defamatory lies.
* Trump Hosts Putin in Alaska for Ukraine Talks (August 16, 2025) Trump rolls out the red carpet for Putin in Alaska to negotiate a Ukraine ceasefire, raising Ukrainian fears of a sellout while showcasing bold diplomacy.
* Whistleblower: Schiff Greenlit Classified Leaks to Smear Trump (August 16, 2025) A Democratic whistleblower tells the FBI that Adam Schiff approved leaking classified info to target Trump, exposing Democrat corruption.
* DOJ Probes Schiff for Alleged Crimes, Comer Says (August 16, 2025) James Comer hints at a DOJ investigation into Adam Schiff’s alleged crimes, warning J6 committee alums to watch their backs as Trump’s team hunts for justice.
Thanks for reading Adjust Accordionly! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.
Before It Was Gay
“Hey old timer, why you drinking that Bud Light?” ”Huh?” ”Your Bud Light… it’s a tranny beer. You’re not queer or something, are you?” ”Listen here, motherfucker…”
I bought this beer back before it was gay, Before they put rainbows on everything, Straight from the can or in a pint glass, Way before them homos shoving shit up their ass,
Long before it all turned queer, I was kicking back a-chugging this beer, Ain’t no lisp talking straight when I say, Man, I bought this beer back before it was gay
“You got yourself a Ford truck, huh?” ”Been driving these for years,” ”You know they’re gay now, right?” ”Listen here, motherfucker…”
I drove a Ford back before it was gay, Way back before tranny library day, Tore through the mud flinging rocks in a whirl, Back before boys started dressing like girls
Back before books telling kids how to fuck, I got around just fine in my Ford pickup truck, Now they paint ‘em up for a rainbow parade, Man, I drove a Ford back before it was gay
“You in ‘Nam, old timer?” ”Sure was, son. Served with pride,” ”You know the military’s full of trannies now, right?” ”Listen here, motherfucker…”
I enlisted back before it was gay, Out there kicking ass for the USA, Out in the world getting my thrills, Before the army started wearing high heels
Back when we gave them commies whatfor, Now China’s pounding hard on our back door, Men in lipstick’s the new American way, Man, I enlisted back before it was gay
“What you still flying that flag for?” ”What are you going on about?” ”America is fucked, man… the system’s rigged, all the politicians are bought and sold, the president’s a senile kid-sniffer, his kid’s a crackhead, there’s gay shit everywhere, and the whole place is going to hell with inflation and foreign bailouts…” ”Listen here, son…”
I loved my country back before she was gay, And I’ll love her long after she’s gone away, I miss the days when you could drink what you want, Join the army and drive a Ford truck
Now Pedo Pete sandbag on his back, Kid’s in the White House a-smoking his crack, The whole country burns while Zelenskyy gets paid, I miss America back before she was gay
I miss America before she was queer, Watching football and drinking a beer, Working hard for an honest day’s pay, Man, I miss America back before she was gay
