Regret Isn’t the Enemy. Rumination Is.
Regret is part of being human.
Rumination is optional.
In this episode, we’re diving into something physicians (and high-achievers in general) know all too well: replaying mistakes on loop.
Whether it’s:
A patient outcome you wish had gone differently
A diagnosis you missed
A moment you snapped at your child after a night shift
Or something you said years ago that still makes you cringe
Regret can quietly take up residence in your mind.
But here’s the truth:
Regret’s job is growth. Not self-punishment.
We explore the difference between helpful reflection and harmful rumination — and why replaying the past over and over actually increases stress, burnout, anxiety, and defensive medicine.
You’ll learn:
✨ Why regret exists (and why it’s not a flaw)
✨ The psychological difference between useful regret and rumination
✨ How regret can subtly become tied to your identity
✨ Signs that regret has outlived its usefulness
✨ A powerful “Regulated Reflection Window” tool
✨ The 3 R’s for moving forward: Repair, Release, Refocus
✨ Why guilt is actually a healthy emotion
✨ How to stop letting imagined “better outcomes” steal your peace
✨ Why transparency after poor outcomes can be restorative
We also share personal stories from residency and clinical practice — including how regret shaped us into better physicians without becoming something we carried forever.
Remember:
Regret is a signal.
It is not a sentence.
It is not your identity.
Once the lesson is learned, you get to move forward.
And you are already a better physician because you care.
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Until next time —
You are whole.
You are a gift to medicine.
And the work you do matters.