Jeff Hittner on the invisible pressures dads carry every day—balancing ambition with presence, holding emotions they were never taught to express, feeling the weight of being a provider while wanting to be deeply connected, and silently wondering whether they're doing enough.
03:18 — Why dads default to fixing
06:10 — How conflict exposes emotional patterns you didn't realize you were repeating
09:27 — What happens inside your body in the first seconds of reactivity
12:55 — How shame hides in anger or withdrawal and shifts your parenting
16:40 — Why ambition and presence feel at odds—and how to hold both
19:12 — How the definition of "providing" can create hidden distance
22:03 — What kids actually need from you when they're dysregulated
26:44 — How small repairs rebuild connection after hard moments
29:58 — Why dads often hide their struggles and how vulnerability helps
33:21 — How real-time emotional attunement works—and what derails it
37:49 — What regulated fatherhood looks like in everyday interactions
41:30 — Why self-compassion matters more than perfect parenting
44:56 — How tiny daily habits build long-term emotional resilience
48:20 — What keeps parents stuck in reactive cycles and how to break them
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