The ability to have difficult conversations is one of the most essential skills of an effective leader. Whether addressing performance, navigating conflict, or working through disagreements, the way the conversation begins often determines how it will end. This episode of the Forward Thinking Podcast features FCCS SVP of Marketing and Communications Stephanie Barton and Jeannie Clinnkenbeard, Director and Senior Leadership Consultant at FCCS. Their conversation is centered around the importance of approaching these moments with greater intention and skill. They explore practical ideas that can help turn tense conversations into productive dialogue, and highlight the value of brave conversations for individuals, teams, and organizations.
Episode Insights Include:
What to think about before a critical conversation
The 60-second gamechanger asks, 'What do I want out of this conversation?'
Positive intent focuses on a win-win scenario.
Share your intent with the other person to set the right tone.
If you focus only on winning, you will not have much success.
Consider how you can learn, solve and grow together.
Defensiveness might result if your intent isn't framed in a mutually positive way.
Next step, share facts
After stating your intent, share the facts surrounding the situation.
Separate your perceived stories and emotions from the facts.
You can reduce the temperature in the conversation with your words.
Spiraling stories can escalate conflict.
Check the stories you're telling yourself
Our stories drive our emotions, so tell them carefully.
The villain story blames the other person.
Question what you are making up to tell the story.
Challenge your assumptions about your stories.
Stop MSU- Making Stuff Up- and stick with the facts.
Strategies for constructive engagement
The 50/50 approach invites the other person to share their thoughts and concerns.
Ask neutral, open-ended questions.
When emotions are high, it can be hard to engage.
If the other person is shutting down, pause the content and focus on empathy and understanding.
Ask clarifying questions to keep the other person engaged.
Stick with the conversation even if it gets uncomfortable, within reason.
Encouraging difficult conversations in others
If you see that a difficult conversation needs to happen between two other people, encourage the first steps.
Volunteer to role-play through the conversation.
The impact of difficult conversations can be critical to a team's success.
The ability to have tough conversations respectfully is a gamechanger.
The person who has the ability to speak up is the most useful person in the room.
This podcast is powered by FCCS.
Resources
Connect with Jeannie Clinnkenbeard – Jeannie Clinnkenbeard
Get in touch – info@fccsconsulting.com
"The more your conversation is focused on a win-win scenario, the more likely the outcome is going to be positive." — Jeannie Clinnkenbeard
"When going into tough conversations, our words don't have to be perfect, they just have to be positive." — Jeannie Clinnkenbeard
"Every human being has the fundamental need to be heard." — Jeannie Clinnkenbeard
"The person who has the ability to speak up is the most useful person in the room." — Jeannie Clinnkenbeard
