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Episode 17 – Influencing with Developed Emotional Intelligence

What is Emotional Intelligence?

The capacity to be aware of, control, and express one's emotions, and to handle interpersonal relationships judiciously and empathetically.

5 Emotional Intelligence Competencies with Solutions to Success

1. Self-Awareness/Reflection – Understanding yourself by knowing your emotional Strengths and Weaknesses. This is also knowing how others perceive us as being know how your mood directs thoughts and decisions.

 Solution to Success: Journal and if you are unsure what to write then use prompts. Also, you can slow down to grab your composure (Take just a few minutes to think). Be introspective in nature and seek honest feedback from those you trust. Become an internal change agent driven to improve weaknesses and strengths. Be honest with yourself and check your ego.

2. Self-Regulation/Discipline – Taking control of your emotions when faced with challenge or stress. Think about decisions and outcomes. Be reserved in language toward others. Holding to your personal values. Do not become a slave to your emotions.

 Solution to Success: Build your own values-based code of conduct. Take ownership no matter the outcome but be sure to praise others when it is good. When faced with giving an emotional response use 15-30 seconds of deep breathing to gain control. Develop 3 different courses of action to allow yourself to think in different directions.

3. Motivation/Purpose – It is important to know why you are doing what you are doing and have a positive mindset of success. Knowing your why in anything you do has to be your center of focus. If you are unsure of your why then your motivation will drain quickly.

 Solution to Success: Find your why, which can be done using the lessons of Simon Sinek. Once you know your why, measure your motivation level (low, medium, high). Set achievable goals to elevate confidence and a positive environment. We will be faced with times of despair or problems so a bridge to overcome is using resilience (Hunt the Good stuff is great for this). We have to remind ourselves; Attitude is everything and to think long term.

4. Empathy – Put yourself in other people’s shoes to help understand their emotional state. This will help you understand the wants, needs, and correlated viewpoints of each. Empathy will allow you to react in a worthy manner according to other people's emotions. A highly useful reaction for you is being calm to help the others be calm.

 Solution to Success: Put yourself in other's shoes by going through a thought process of you being the one going through the emotion due to a circumstance. Good or bad visualize yourself going through the same instance. Train yourself to be observant of body language, but also be aware that your body language could be what they are mimicking. Once you notice another’s feelings then respond to them and attempt to create a positive situation if need be.

5. Social Skills – Having the ability to communicate with others no matter the circumstance or situation. Being a team player who creates an atmosphere or environment of positive movement forward to success. Social Skills open the doors of success for others through positive affirmation and motivation. The foundation of this is relationship building.

 Solutions to Success: Learn about conflict resolution and how to direct the conflict when faced with it. Improve communication verbally and nonverbally by engaging in meaningful conversation and by paying attention to your body language. You should strive to have the tough conversations as much as the easy ones. Praise of others is key to building relationships.

Books talked about in this episode:

• Emotional Intelligence – https://amzn.to/2JPg9Z9
• Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff…and it’s all small stuff – https://amzn.to/2FHikIZ
• The First Time Manager – https://amzn.to/2WyTSAw
• Start with Why – https://amzn.to/2OEZt5G
• Find Your Why – https://amzn.to/2FMANFe
• Extreme Ownership – https://amzn.to/2FCiuBy
• The Way of The Seal – https://amzn.to/2K6SPXl
• The Three Meter Zone – https://amzn.to/2Wx554t
• 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace – https://amzn.to/2Wx58gF
• Leading With Honor - https://amzn.to/2Up10BW

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Intro & Outro Music:

Cosmic Storm by A Himitsu: https://soundcloud.com/a-himitsu

Creative Commons – Attribution 3.0 Unported – CC By 3.0:

       http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Music promoted by Audio Library: https://youtu.be/U4wXUdhNxZk