Today’s podcast comes with a bit of a health warning.
Moderation is not something we recommend here at Tribe Sober – mainly because so many us were trapped in what I call the moderation swamp.
We tried (and failed) over and over again to moderate our alcohol intake – all because we counldn’t imagine life without out gass of wine!
Personally the whole of my 50’s was spent in that battle to moderate… a battle that I never won and it’s only now I’m well and truly out the other side that I can see the reality which is that once we’ve crossed a line into dependence we can never moderate – we can never go back…
We just need to put all that effort we put into moderation into creating a beautiful alcohol free life – a life we don’t want to escape from..
Having said all that I do know that we have some “sober curious” people listening to this podcast, people who’ve not yet crossed that line into dependence.. so this episode will be of particular interest to them..
But if you were worried about your drinking and you have managed to clock up a period of sobriety then I would urge you to hang in there… it will get better and better and trying to moderate could take you back to Day One again!
So let’s get to my guest who is Pamela Power, who is an author, a television script writer and has published a book called “My Year of Not Getting Shitfaced”..
In this episode:-
- Pamela’s mother was dependent on alcohol
- As a result Pamela become a people pleaser - anxiously watching for her mothers behaviour to change as she drank
- As a teenager Pamela sampled homemade wines on her grandmother's farm in Ireland
- There was occasional drinking during teenage years and university but nothing excessive
- Her drinking Increased as she enjoyed socialising with her friends during weekends and social events
- This period was pre-parenthood so the responsibilities of motherhood put the brakes on her drinking
- In spite of this she found herself drinking more during social gatherings and stressful periods, especially during COVID-19 pandemic
- She recognised that there could be a potential problem even though she certainly didn’t fit the traditional addiction narrative
- Pamela experienced an embarrassing blackout during Mothers Day and decided she needed to take a break and reassess her drinking habits
- Her intention was to experiment with moderation and take periodic breaks as a means of self-awareness and health maintenance
- Pamela acknowledges that she had no idea of the low risk limits or alcohol
- She is not alone in this – many people are unaware of those limits.
- To be clear the World Health Organisation says that to be healthy we shouldn’t drink alcohol at all.
- The evidence is stacking up and it's now proven that alcohol is linked to 7 types of cancer and more than 60 diseases.
- Moderation means drinking no more than a bottle and a half of wine A WEEK.
- Knowing I had to drink within those limits is actually one of the things that helped me to quit. Drinking a small glass of wine in the evening was not going to give me a buzz so I might as well quit!
- We discussed the societal differences in drinking culture, highlighting the sober curious movement and the way the younger generation seems to be falling out of love with alcohol
- The latest stats from UK tell us that a massive 40% of 18-24 year olds don’t drink at all!
- Pamela enjoys fine wines but does recognize their addictive nature.
- We reflected on the challenges of sober socializing and the benefits of leaving social events early.
- We agreed on the importance of finding new sources of entertainment and occupation without alcohol.
- I mentioned my concern about the possibility that her book could tempt people to try (or retry) moderation when they really needed to quit as they were already dependent.
- Pamela explained that she had read a lot of quitlit and could not identify with any of the authors as their stories were too extreme
- So she has written this book recognising that there are different drinking patterns and that her story will resonate with those people who are simply sober curious
- The book is called, "My Year of Not Getting Shit Faced," available online and in bookstores.
- More Info
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