SOBER SHORT 10 – Be Prepared!
I’m kicking off our Sober Short series by taking you through our Tribe Sober Toolkit – this toolkit is just one of the things that we share with you during our regular Zoom workshops – just go to tribesober.com, hit Our Services and you’ll find all the info about our workshops. You can do a group workshop or a private workshop to suit your schedule and time zone.
These workshops have been a gamechanger for many people so if you want to kickstart your sober life then sign up today. Just go to tribesober.com/services and click on workshops
During the first 9 Sober Shorts, we looked at the first 9 Tools in our toolbox. Before we move on to tool number 10 let’s do a quick recap…
In this Episode
Tool number 1 was “Get Connected”
- Connection is the Opposite of Addiction” and if you’re serious about getting sober then you need to connect with others on the same path.
- If you’re not yet a member of our tribe please check us out on tribesober.com – just hit “join our tribe” to read about the benefits of membership.
Tool number 2 was “Get Moving”
- We all know is that exercise is “good for us” and many people exercise daily but they also drink daily – sometimes excessively. Ditch the drink and keep exercising and you will be amazed at how much fitter you will get!
Tool number 3 was “Building Emotional Strength”
- All about “learning to sit with our feelings” – instead of trying to chase them away with alcohol – alcohol is the “easy button” and enables us to bypass difficult emotions.
- We have to “get comfortable with being uncomfortable as Tribe Sober coach Lynette says, or as Glennon Doyle says, “First the Pain, then the Rising.”
Tool number 4 was all about Mindset
- It was about changing your thinking – about drinking.
- We talked about overturning those false beliefs that we have picked up over the years — for example, we believe that we deserve a drink at the end of the day!
- We talked about overturning those beliefs – one by one.
- “Do the work” and you will never see alcohol in the same way and…
- You will never suffer from FOMO which is the key to sticking to your sobriety.
Tool number 5 – was about Visualisation
- We talked about some powerful ways to use visualisation.
- One of them was to “Play the movie forward” – if you get the urge to drink, then just think it through – what will happen after that first glass. Do you really want to wake up at 3 am full of anxiety and regret?
- Do you really want to keep going back to Day 1 – and do the hardest bit - again and again?
Tool number 6 – Information is Power
- It’s hard to believe it these days but not that long ago we had NO IDEA that smoking was bad for us.
- Even if you do decide to carry on drinking then make sure that it’s an informed choice. The information is out there and just a quick google search will connect you with scientific research proving that alcohol is linked to 7 different types of cancer and more than 60 diseases.
- That’s a good place to start and there are many QuitLit books out there and of course podcasts – almost 100 episodes of the Tribe Sober podcast are available now, all packed with advice inspiration and information.
- If you’d like a QuitLit Reading list just email janet@ts.com – you can also go to tribesober.com and hit the Inspiration tab where you’ll find a wealth of information that will inspire you to get started – and motivate you to keep going.
Tool number 7 was “Be Accountable”
- When we embark on this journey, we need a community of people who actually care – people who have been where we are now and can advise and encourage us - people who are thriving in their alcohol-free lives and can inspire us that it really is worth doing this thing.
- WE NEED TO BE ACCOUNTABLE – we need to know that we can share our ups and downs with other people who really get us.
- So, if you are looking for a sober community to inspire you and keep you on track just go to tribesober.com and hit join our tribe.
- If you’d like to sample the kind of support we offer then email janet@tribesober.com and request our Sobriety Battleplan pdf which is packed with great advice, charts and trackers.
Tool Number 8 - which is “Journaling”
- At our workshops, we advise people to buy a beautiful notebook that will become their sobriety journal throughout this life-changing journey.
- Sobriety is a journey of self-discovery and recording your thoughts, emotions, struggles, and accomplishments is so beneficial.
- Early sobriety is a very emotional time and for most of us it really helps to process emotions if we can write them down.
- We can note our triggers as well as strategies for coping with them
- Journaling will give us perspective – reading back on the early weeks of sobriety will remind us just how hard it was – and make us realise it’s getting better and easier every day.
- To learn more about the magic of journaling listen to Tribe Sober podcast episode 98 to hear my interview with writer in recovery Melinda Ferguson – released on 26th March 2022
Tool No 9 – “Get a Project”
- It’s very common for people to feel a bit flat once they have achieved their first few months of sobriety.
- Many people in Tribe Sober (including me) experienced that “flatness’/depression/void” or whatever you want to call it – when they asked me what they should do about it I just told them to sit it out as it would eventually pass
- However that advice changed after my podcast interview with Dr Loretta Breuning (author of the Happy Brain) – so do have a listen, its episode 55 and was released on 14 August 2021.
- Loretta explained that my brain was quite happy during the first few months as it had registered that it was working on a project (ie sobriety) and I was making progress – however after a few months my subconscious was thinking – ok so now we are sober, now what?
- Well here’s the thing – as human beings we need projects – think of the cavemen, they would wake up hungry and have to go and find some food, eating the food would give them a dopamine hit but then they would get hungry again and have to go hunting..
- So as you settle into your first few months of sobriety GET A PROJECT to keep you on track and to keep those happy brain chemicals triggered.
This week we are looking at:-
Tool No 10 - Be Prepared!
- As with most things in life preparation is crucial…
- Imagine if you are going out for the evening and you decide that you will “decide whether or not to drink when you get there” – so of course when the waiter or your host offer you a glass of wine you find yourself automatically accepting!
- Make the decision not to drink before you leave the house!
- Play the movie forward – what ARE you going to drink – if it’s a restaurant then check out their drinks menu online and decide what you will order – even if they don’t have any AF choices sparkling water goes can be your fallback
- If you are going to a dinner party the text your host in advance and take some AF bubbly with you
- Decide what you are going to say when/if people start to interrogate you – you can keep it simple “I’m on meds”, “I’m driving” or my favourite “I’m on a healthkick – no booze, no sugar, no carbs for 66 days!”
- As you clock up more sober time and get more used to navigating our alcohol drenched society you will get more confident and find that you enjoy saying “I don’t drink”
- Remember its’ not your responsibility to make others feel comfortable about their drinking
- Having said that the worst thing to say is probably “I’m worried about my drinking” as everybody will then pile into reassure you that you are fine (because you drink the same as them!)
- So to summarise you need to “play the movie forward”
- Look at your calendar for the month ahead, look at any upcoming social events which may be challenging and plan carefully
- If drinking at home was your problem then give away your booze – or move it to somewhere you can’t see it (the garage is a good place) and make sure your fridge is stocked with delicious AF choices – if you are in SA just go to drinknil.co.za and they will deliver to your door
- Tribe Sober members get a discount from drink nil so go to tribesober.com and hit “join our tribe!”
More Info
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