It’s ok to care for people as long as you continue to care for yourself.
Christina H. grew up loving the wide-open outdoors of Wyoming, always playing the role of the helper, the fixer, the one who held everything together. That instinct followed her into adulthood and eventually into a marriage affected by alcoholism, where love slowly turned into chaos, confusion, and an exhausting illusion of control.
In this deeply honest episode of The Cup of Joe Show, Christina shares how trying to fix her husband’s drinking by drinking alongside him only deepened the pain. Fertility struggles, unanswered prayers, and nights of waiting for someone who didn’t come home left her feeling broken and punished. Everything changed when a simple question cracked the door open: Has your life been affected by someone else’s drinking?
After scoring 100% on the Al-Anon questionnaire, Christina walked into her first meeting and found something she had been searching for her entire life: calm. With the help of a sponsor, the first three steps, and a higher power found in nature, she began learning how to let go without giving up, how to care without controlling, and how to choose peace over being right.
Christina talks openly about divorce, starting over, and the powerful tools that guide her recovery today: pausing before reacting, practicing H.A.L.T., using a God Box to let go, daily readings from Courage to Change, and the life-saving practice of connection through sponsorship and service.
Now married to her best friend, Pete M., and living a life grounded in honesty and spiritual growth, Christina shows what’s possible when we stop fixing others and start caring for ourselves.
This episode is for anyone who has loved an alcoholic, lost themselves trying to help, or wondered if peace was ever possible.
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📌 Mentioned in this episode:
🔗 Has your life been affected by someone else’s drinking?
Take the Al-Anon self-quiz for newcomers.
🔗 Illusion of Control: Pete M. Goes All-In
The Cup of Joe Show episode featuring Pete M.
🌟 For daily encouragement, visit Daily Ponderables — your source for inspiration 365 days a year.
The Cup of Joe Show explores the journey of recovery from alcohol and drug addiction—one story, one conversation, and one step at a time. New Episode Every Thursday at Noon.
