River + Michele unpack Love bombing this week. It is a form of emotional manipulation that uses overwhelming affection, attention, and praise to influence and control someone—especially in the early stages of a relationship. It can look and feel like a fairytale romance at first, but underneath, it’s often about control, dependency, and power, not genuine connection.
💣 What Love Bombing Is All About
🔥 1. Intensity Over Authenticity
It’s not real love—it’s a calculated performance.
Love bombers flood you with affection, compliments, texts, and promises to fast-track emotional intimacy.
The goal is to sweep you off your feet so fast you don’t notice the red flags.
It creates emotional dependency. Once you’re attached, the dynamic can flip into manipulation, criticism, jealousy, or control.
Love bombers often don’t truly see or value you as a unique person.
They’re projecting an idealized version of love, often to fill their own insecurity, loneliness, or narcissistic need for admiration.
Idealization: “You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
Devaluation: “You’re not who I thought you were.” (Criticism, withdrawal of affection.)
Discard: They ghost you or move on fast—or keep you hanging with crumbs while chasing new admiration.
⚠️ Why It’s Dangerous
Love bombing can:
Create trauma bonds, where your nervous system associates love with chaos.
Lead to emotional or psychological abuse.
Leave you doubting your worth, instincts, and reality after the crash.
❤️🩹 What Real Love Looks Like Instead
Paces itself.
Respects your boundaries.
Is consistent, not overwhelming.
Grows over time, not overnight.
Comes from mutual curiosity, not fantasy.
Bottom line:
Love bombing isn’t love. It’s a manipulation tactic that disguises control as affection. Recognizing it is the first step toward protecting your peace, boundaries, and capacity for real, grounded connection.
💔 People Most Susceptible to Love Bombing
1. Empaths & Highly Sensitive People
Feel deeply, want to help and heal others.
May ignore red flags in favor of understanding or compassion.
The intense validation from love bombers feels like healing.
They're more likely to believe they’ve finally been "seen" or "chosen."
Especially those with childhood emotional neglect or abandonment issues.
Love bombing may mimic the attention or affection they always longed for.
Hopeless romantics, spiritual seekers, or people who deeply value “the one.”
They might interpret love bombing as destiny or divine connection.
Still grieving or raw, they may be more likely to overlook warning signs for the comfort of new affection.
The contrast to their last relationship feels intoxicating.
Those who grew up in dysfunctional homes or never saw modeled emotional regulation.
May confuse intensity for intimacy.
Feel responsible for others’ emotions and derive their worth from being needed.
They may fall into roles of "fixing" or "saving" the love bomber.
🧠 Also:
Love bombing thrives in transitional moments—a breakup, job loss, move, grief, or spiritual searching. These moments of identity shift can leave someone open to outside validation and connection that feels like a lifeline.
⚠️ Why This Matters
It’s not about blame—it’s about awareness. People who are kind, open-hearted, and hopeful are often targeted because of those strengths. The solution isn't to harden—but to learn the difference between love and control, intimacy and intensity, devotion and manipulation.
Love bombing is a form of emotional manipulation that uses overwhelming affection, attention, and praise to influence and control someone, especially in the early stages of a relationship. It can look and feel like a fairytale romance at first, but underneath, it’s often about control, dependency, and power, not genuine connection.
💣 What Love Bombing Is All About
🔥 1. Intensity Over Authenticity
It’s not real love—it’s a calculated performance.
Love bombers flood you with affection, compliments, texts, and promises to fast-track emotional intimacy.
The goal is to sweep you off your feet so fast you don’t notice the red flags.
It creates emotional dependency. Once you’re attached, the dynamic can flip into manipulation, criticism, jealousy, or control.
Love bombers often don’t truly see or value you as a unique person.
They’re projecting an idealized version of love, often to fill their own insecurity, loneliness, or narcissistic need for admiration.
Idealization: “You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
Devaluation: “You’re not who I thought you were.” (Criticism, withdrawal of affection.)
Discard: They ghost you or move on fast—or keep you hanging with crumbs while chasing new admiration.
⚠️ Why It’s Dangerous
Love bombing can:
Create trauma bonds, where your nervous system associates love with chaos.
Lead to emotional or psychological abuse.
Leave you doubting your worth, instincts, and reality after the crash.
❤️🩹 What Real Love Looks Like Instead
Paces itself.
Respects your boundaries.
Is consistent, not overwhelming.
Grows over time, not overnight.
Comes from mutual curiosity, not fantasy.
Bottom line:
Love bombing isn’t love. It’s a manipulation tactic that disguises control as affection. Recognizing it is the first step toward protecting your peace, boundaries, and capacity for real, grounded connection.