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In this powerful mindset session, Brad and Kaylene introduce the Four Levels of Behavior Change — a framework that transformed how they approached everything from yelling in their relationship to media addiction. The four levels are: unaware, aware with no control, aware with control, and non-issue. Understanding where you are on this ladder helps you see that you're making progress even when it doesn't feel like it.
The hardest part of this journey is level two, where you watch yourself do the thing you know you shouldn't be doing but feel powerless to stop. But here's the truth: it's not that you don't have control — it's that you're unaware of where to exert that control. As you move into level three, you start catching yourself earlier and earlier on the path toward the negative behavior until eventually you can stop before you even start.
The ultimate goal is level four: non-issue. This is where the behavior no longer has any pull on you. Brad and Kaylene share that it took about 90-110 days of focused effort to reach this point with their biggest habits. That means by the end of the year, you could eliminate one major negative behavior from your life entirely. You don't have to fight your bad habits forever — you just need to fight them long enough until they become a non-issue.
💡 What You'll Learn
🧠 Key Takeaway
You won't have to fight your bad habits forever. With focused effort for 90-110 days, any negative behavior can become a complete non-issue — no urge, no pull, no struggle. You're not broken. You're just ascending through the levels.
🔗 Next Steps
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CHAPTERS:
00:00 Introduction and Welcome
01:17 Today's Topic: Four Levels of Behavior Change
07:09 Level 1: Unawareness
08:40 Level 2: Awareness Without Control
11:47 Level 3: Awareness With Control
27:01 Understanding the Feeling of No Control
27:20 The Habit Changing Timeline
27:38 The Effort Curve in Behavior Change
28:08 Reaching the Final Level: Behavior as a Non-Issue
29:18 Personal Journeys and Examples
32:26 The Importance of Specificity in Behavior Change
34:56 Making a Commitment to Change
38:29 Defining and Tackling Specific Behaviors
42:02 Community Sharing and Support
51:24 Final Thoughts and Encouragement
Topics Covered: PTSD recovery • behavior change • breaking bad habits • addiction recovery • awareness framework • habit change • sobriety • relationship patterns • yelling • media addiction • self-control • mindset for change • recovery rehearsal • habit momentum • 90-day challenge • lifestyle change • negative behaviors • personal growth