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Welcome back to Jokes Out Loud, the show where we take life’s strangest little moments and turn them into full-course comedy. I’m your host, Thomas Smith, and today… oh boy… we’re diving into a modern mystery that has shaken humanity to its core: Why does a bowl of lettuce now cost more than a whole pizza?

Yes—somewhere in the world, a chef sprinkled two almonds on top of a leaf and decided it was worth the price of a small car. Today, we’re exploring the economics, emotions, and existential crisis behind the salad that thinks it’s better than us. Grab a seat, grab a snack—preferably something cheaper than salad—and let’s get into it.