Today's episode differs from previous ones on Breaking Free, it is special in the sense that it is an actual introductory coaching session with a client. It is a rare opportunity to hear what the experience of being coached is like and perhaps gaining some clarity through hearing the client's experience and discoveries. The client wants to discover why he can't make decisions lately with regards to his career choices and love life. Issues can not be solved in one session but some clarity and understanding can be gained which will help in moving forward.
Points discussed:
- The issue that the client requires help with is moving forward and making decisions about his career and love life (3:00)
- Realizing that after years of being told what to do and how to do it, making decisions in the last few years after living away from home is scary (5:50)
- How lack of trust in the self can be a result of parents not allowing their children to make mistakes (7:00)
- Growing up in a conservative family with an abusive father resulted in a fear of making mistakes (8:08)
- A recent example of struggling with a decision is shared (10:00)
- A pattern of relationships with dependent partners emerges (13;25)
- Discovering a trigger and the best way to deal with it (17:00)
- How to respond in Adult instead of reacting with a child-like or parent dynamic (19:10)
- Codependency (24:00)
- Unlearning what we learned is a big step forward (26:00)
- Learning to love your inner child instead of bullying and numbing the self (28:05)
- Realizing we don't know what we don't know (33:00)
- Where to look for support (37:00)
- Takeaways and summary of what the client gained from the session. And a hint of how he can begin to make the decisions he wants to make with support in further sessions (38:25)
References:
Codependent no more by Melody Beattie
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