https://snltranscripts.jt.org/06/06qunder.phtml
[walking into a convenience store] Whoo! What a hard day at the office! How was your job at the factory?
Hard and long. Long day down at the factory, where I've worked for years.
How long has it been?
Oh me, down at the factory? I'd have to say six, seven years.
Since you were eighteen?
That's right, and I'm 24 now, so that makes six years down at the factory, working.
Wow! [grabs case of beer from shelf] I'm still one year older than you, [hands case of beer to Factory Worker] so that makes me 25. [grabs another case of beer and starts walking up to the cashier with Factory Worker].
We're a couple of old timers. Hello, my man, looks like we'll be having these two old cases of beer today.
You guys got some I.D.?
You bet. [starts looking in pockets, you know he is obviously faking it] Oh, shoot. I just remembered something. I was on the golf course this morning with some business associates and we were exchanging business cards and I must have given one of the guys my driver's license by mistake. It's a true story, or else how could I have these three business cards from real businesses? [fans out three cards in front of cashier's face] I ask you that. [sets cards on counter]
It's not a problem as long as one of you guys has an I.D.
Uh, that would be my department. [Starts rustling his pockets and pulls out wallet] Yeah, there it is, hold on just a second. I got it renewed a couple of days ago. Oh! It was here and now it's gone. Oh shoot. I guess one of the kids must have stolen it again. They think it's a toy.
How old are those little guys now?
Well, I got a 7, got a 6 year old, and I got a 3 year old. One of them must have gotten in my wallet and grabbed my I.D. [slaps Businessman's shoulder] You know what, I bet it was Kevin.
Oh, that Kevin! Always up to no good. Anyways, we should just get these beers and get on out of here.
Yes indeed, time to settle up.
Oh, do you need any smokes?
Oh no, I got plenty of smokes at the other store where we were just at five minutes ago.
Oh, where we bought the other cases of beer!
That's the one! Listen to us go on about all the cases of beer we buy all the time.
So anyways, how much do we owe you, partner?
Yeah, I still need to see some I.D. [pulls beer toward him] [Police enters store]
Good work, guy! You passed the test!
What are you talking about?
I'm Agent Parker with the ATF. Agent Ron Harris and Pat Richards here work for the ATF and we've been running sting operations trying to catch store clerks selling alcohol to underage kids.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
