After getting caught imitating his boss (Leslie Jones), a new employee (Louis C.K.) must play off the impression as his real talking voice in order to not get fired.
https://snltranscripts.jt.org/15/this-is-how-i-talk.phtml
Jay Pharoah
Venessa Bayer
Donald… Louis C.K.
Brenda… Leslie Jones
Aidy Bryant
Kate McKinnon
[Starts with Sprint phone shop]
Jay: So, that’s pretty much how the job works, Donald. Welcome aboard.
Venessa: When you’re here at Sprint, you’re a framily.
Donald: Well, thanks again. Like I said, I really need this job. I haven’t worked for a long time and I don’t want to blow another opportunity.
Jay: Well, if you care about keeping this job, word of advice, don’t piss off Brenda.
Brenda: Oh, I’m sorry. Am I running the charity here? Coz the last time I checked, I’m paying your asses to work. Okay? Which means your asses better be working or else, you’re done!
Jay: Yes, ma’am!
[Brenda leaves] [Cut to Donald]
Donald: I’m guessing that’s Brenda. Wow, is that how she really talks?
[Brenda comes back] [mocking Brenda] I’m paying your asses to work. Which means your asses better be working.[Cut to Jay and Venessa. Venessa is warning Donald about Brenda.]
Venessa: Okay, dude. Don’t!
Brenda: Excuse me? I’m sorry. [Cut to Donald and Brenda] Is that how you think I talk? Is that your little impression of me?
[Donald looks around]
Donald: [trying speak like Brenda as if he speaks like that all the time.] Why you fronting on me? I ain’t talking like you. I’m talking like my damn self!
[audience laughing]
And your ass better back up coz otherwise you’re gonna be clowned on this fellow, umm!
Brenda: So, you’re saying this is how you actually talk?
Donald: I’m talking like my mama taught me to talk. And if you clowning on my mom then you’s about to get bounced!
Brenda: Okay. If that’s how you really talk then we ain’t got a problem.
Donald: Um-hmm. Well, okay then. [snaps] [Brenda leaves] [Cut to Jay and Venessa]
Jay: Dude, what the hell was that?
[Cut to Donald]
Donald: [speaking normally] I don’t know. I just got caught and I panicked.
[Cut to Jay and Venessa]
Venessa: What are you gonna do now?
[Cut to everybody]
Donald: I mean I need this job. [Brenda walks behind Donald] I just gonna have to stay this way.
Jay: Like, forever?
Donald: [Donald starts acting again] Like, I was saying. Who you think you is? Angela bastard! I ain’t tryna’ front on no chicken hog.
[looking at Brenda] Oh, damn, Brenda! Where did you get those nails did. They on fleek![Brenda walks away quietly]
That was close. I don’t know how long I can keep this up.
[Cut to Sprint- One Year Later] [Cut to Donald and a customer]
Aidy: So, basically I can’t text outdoors, which seems pretty bad.
...
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
