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For this episode we were lucky enough to be joined by Dr. Fiona Vera-Gray, one of the UK’s leading feminist academics working on sexual violence, and the Deputy director at the Child and Women Abuse Studies Unit at London Metropolitan University. 

Earlier this year, Fiona published her book, Women on Porn, where she interviewed 100 women on their experiences with pornography – how they first encountered it, how they consume it, how it has affected their sex lives and relationships, what they like and what they don’t. Toshi and Fiona spoke about what inspired the book, how people have responded to it, how porn impacts our sex lives and the conflicting feelings that many women have towards their porn use.  

Check out Fiona here: https://www.fionaveragray.com/ 

Find Women on Porn here: https://www.fionaveragray.com/book-women-on-porn.html 

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Timestamps:  

00:00 – Intro  

01:14 – What kicked off the book?  

02:58 – What are sexual scripts?  

04:29 – How does porn impact our sex lives?  

06:26 – The problem with the Fast and Furious analogy  

08:03 – Balancing regulation and privacy  

09:49 – Removing the judgement from the conversation 

13:33 – It’s not as simple as pro-porn or anti-porn 

15:34 - What women say about their first sexual experiences  

17:30 – Advice if you feel conflicted about your porn use  

22:05 – How people have responded to Women on Porn  

24:00 – What positive impacts can porn have? 

27:32 – Fiona’s challenges working in this space  

29:24 – Men’s responses to her work  

30:51 – Supporting young people  

32:50 – Women’s responses to Fiona’s work 

34:32 – Feeling validated by other women's experiences 

36:00 – What about feminist/ethical porn?  

38:09 - How our sexual desires are shaped by culture  

40:26 – Conclusion  

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Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy. 

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For more info, check out our website at: 

https://www.sexinspace.com/ 


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