Description

Content Warning: Those who have experienced trauma and gaslighting should listen with caution.

Aniesa hasn’t always recognised parental gaslighting but has discovered that it is something that is more common than many of us realise and can even come from a place of misguided care. In this episode, Aniesa explores the role of gaslighting in parenting, how it frequently occurs, how to recognise it and how to prevent using it as a parental tool.  

KEY TAKEAWAYS 

• Aniesa recognises that as a parent, she has used gaslighting without realising it.
• You may dismiss or deny your children's feelings, telling them they are being overly sensitive or dramatic. This is a form of gaslighting and children may feel like their feelings don’t matter.
• Gaslighting parents may tell their children that they are remembering things incorrectly or that they didn’t experience events in the way that they are describing. This will make a child feel like they can’t trust their own memory, leading to self-doubt and confusion.
• Parents may blame children for their own behaviour, making children feel like they are responsible for our bad mood. This can lead to them internalising their carer’s negative emotions producing feelings of anxiety and shame.
• Using humour or sarcasm to belittle children. It may not be intentional but it can make them feel unimportant and upset.
• Gaslighting parents may compare their children to others, by pointing out other children’s achievements or asking them to be more like someone else, leading them to feel inadequate.

 BEST MOMENTS

‘We may do so to maintain control,  maintain power and have a sense of power dynamic in our parent-child relationships”

‘When a parent engages in gaslighting it can have long-lasting effects on their child's mental health and wellbeing

‘Think about the language that you are using’

‘How often do you blame your children for your own behaviour?’

‘That can make the child feel like they are responsible for the parent's wellbeing which is incredibly stressful and overwhelming [for them]’

CONTACT METHOD

www.instagram.com/aniesabblore/          
www.instagram.com/sensationalkidstherapyuk/   
www.facebook.com/sensationalkidslondon

ABOUT THE HOST

Aniesa completed her degree in Occupational Therapy at the University of Stellenbosch, in South Africa. She has since been focusing on pediatrics and sensory processing and integration. She has worked across a range of pediatric fields and has extensive experience in autism, specific learning difficulties, as well as anxiety and emotional regulation.

Aniesa has one teenage son with autism, and one with sensory difficulties. She herself was diagnosed at a late age as having ADHD and has found that understanding her neurodivergence has led to a greater connection with children and their parents.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.