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Kelly & Ellen are back together to celebrate 50 recorded podcasts and share a favorite coaching tool "Notice without Judgement".
3 guidelines for “Noticing Without Judgment”
- Ask questions first
- What is happening here?
- What do I have control over?
- Were my expectations realistic? What were my expectations?
- What can I learn from this?
- What can I learn about myself from this?
- I wonder what the other person’s perspective is on this?
- Notice: Is it possible that…..
- I’m wrong
- The other person thinks differently than I do
- We are all doing the best we can
- I’m trying to control something I actually have no control over
- Even though i didn’t get my way or it didn't go the way I planned, maybe this result will be for the best in the long run and I’ll learn why later
- Try the “How human of me”/“Oh hello” tool
- When you make mistakes/have regrets - stop beating yourself up for being human. Try the thought “How human of me” instead
- When you have repeated unwanted thoughts, habits, urges, feelings (like the ones below), rather than judging yourself for their existence or denying their presence, say hello (“Oh hello, fear, I see you’ve returned”). Allow their presence without letting them take over (“I see you are there, I feel you, but you are not the boss of me”).
- Feeling inferior/Imposter complex/jealousy/comparison
- Worry/anxiety/fear
- Urge to escape through shopping, eating, drinking, etc.
Keep practicing using these tools-they really do work!
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