Author Laura Brockel is with me today on The New Old You to talk about her experiences in dating and online dating after 50 and her practical advice and suggestions if you decide to jump into this World yourself.
Her book, Still Kissing Toads, is packed full of hilarious stories and lessons learned along the way. Some of her suggestions include:
1. To get started know that all the dating apps are basically the same, but because it can be so time consuming, pick ONE app to work because you’ll see a lot of the same people on all of the apps.
2. Just because you and a guy may both swipe right on each other, you may not hear from him or you may not reach out to him. Just be willing to throw your hook in the water and see what you catch. Don’t be afraid of the catch and release of online dating.
3. The dating profile speaks volumes about the person. For instance, if there is nothing really written in the profile, then this person more than likely will make zero effort. Look for the RED FLAGS.
4. Before you put out your profile, come up with YOUR list of non-negotiables and things you ARE willing to negotiate on. Hone in your filters. What are you willing to accept and what are you NOT willing to accept.
5. Do work on yourself first. Are you the best version of you because you get back what you put out. Decide up front what you really want in your next relationship.
6. Put your selections through your “friend filter” or “kid filter”. Make sure to tell them to be honest with you.
7. For safety, keep your communication through the app. Be careful of giving out your personal information like address and phone number until you are familiar with that person.
8. Don’t automatically discount someone if you don’t initially click on the app or over text. Give people a chance or two. Can lack of an initial spark grow over time? None of us were put here to go through life alone. Everyone wants connection. Don’t discount someone because of their profile or your first meeting - get to know them. They may end up a good friend or someone you can turn to.
9. Learn a lesson from each encounter. Each time you go through the experience you may learn something about someone and or yourself. Use it moving forward.
10. What should you include in your dating profile. Put something about what it is you are really looking for. Be Positive. Put down what your interests are and be honest. Look at your profile and see it through someone else’s eyes.
11. Go online - you are not going to meet someone sitting at home. You have to make yourself available. Don’t be afraid to talk to people. You need to get comfortable with conversation. Force yourself out of your comfort zone.
Laura's book is available a
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