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Communication between parents and athletes is important, there’s no denying that. But what if they start to communicate less?

Some parents conclude that this situation comes with age. As their children get older, they tend to communicate less. That’s true.  Another reason why they communicate less is because we’re not asking better questions. 

What can we do when that situation arises? 

Dive in to learn about simple ways to increase your communication with your athlete daughter!

Giving The Opportunity for Your Daughter to Open Up

I want to share with you a comment from Nicole, one of our Elite Competitor Program moms, that she shared after working through our Powerful Pep-Talk phase. If you’re not familiar, it is part of our Elite Competitor Program, a mental training program for female athletes, and in that program we train both the athlete and their moms on how to have Powerful Pep Talks. 

Here’s what she said, 

“I love this lesson and the reminder of my role as a parent and to keep it simple. I'm also grateful for more dialogue that's opening up with my daughter, who came to me this weekend saying: you said to let me know if there's something you can do better to support me. And honestly, it would be helpful if you smile more at me. Even when something doesn't go well on the court, it makes me feel positive.”

This is a result of our mental training program. Learning is power. We teach moms what to say before, during, and after competitions and how to strengthen their mental game, how to work on their own confidence, because we know how it influences their daughters.

Their daughters also work on themselves through the athlete modules.

I’m setting it as an example of what happens when moms give their best to learn how to support their daughters in a better way. 

Two Keys to Know What Your Daughter Needs

By giving the opportunities to train her mental skills, Nicole’s daughter learned to be vocal and specific about what she needs from her mom, and that’s how Nicole opened up this opportunity for her daughter to open up. 

How can you help apply this with your daughter?

There's two keys here:

  1. Shape the environment. When we talk about shaping the environment, we're talking about your verbal and your nonverbal communication with your daughter.  We teach things that we can say to build long term confidence in your daughter and how you show up for her as her role model. So, make sure that you’re investing in opportunities to learn how to shape the environment for your daughter, and not just guessing what to do.
  2. Provide the opportunities. Provide opportunities for her not just outwardly, but also inwardly. Give her the opportunity to understand what she needs from you to get where she wants to be. 

Overall, a simple thing that moms can do to increase communication with their daughter is by opening up the opportunity to ask:

“What can I do to support you?”

“What is helpful for me to say and do?” 

Good communication happens when you give opportunities for your daughter to learn how to advocate for themselves and how to develop those mental skills. 

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