Roomies
Original College Humor
Going away to college and residing in a dorm is an opportunity to learn to live with differences. Roommates can learn how to accommodate the needs of others. However, what happens when the roomie you are assigned to live with proves so different that it almost seems as if he came from another planet. You ask for help in dealing with Seth, but the university can’t provide any.
“OK, if the University won’t help me, then it is up to me. Be ready, Seth, for total war.
I have long been a fan of the James Bond 007 movies. So, my first plans turn to slicing Seth up with a powerful space laser, or maybe filling our dorm room with saltwater and then bringing in a bevy of very hungry tiger sharks. Alligators would work too. Maybe even piranha.
Then, there’s that great Clint Eastwood movie where he climbs a mountain with a group of men who, one by one, mysteriously keep falling off their ropes. He didn’t know which one was his target, so, one-by-one, he eliminated them all. Long way down, Seth!
Or, maybe I could go old school gangster. Maybe I could take him to the lake for a one-way boat ride, and then, when were in the middle of the lake, I could fit him with a custom pair of cement boots.
If I went medieval, then there are all kinds of possibilities. Torture him on the rack. Burn him at the stake. Shoot with a quiver of arrows. The possibilities for inflicting cruelty are endless.
But, I rejected all of those options. Too expensive. Too much work. Too complicated.
Instead, I opted for a low-tech guerilla war.”
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College humor based on all-too-true experiences!
