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On the podcast this week, Steven and Sean are oiling ourselves up and driving around some ladies in Louis Leterrier and Corey Yuen’s film from 2002, The Transporter. Oh, we’re also kicking some serious ass.

Did I really say “oiling up”? Yeah, of course I did. Don’t you know what kind of film this masterpiece of cinema is? Don’t you understand that it stars the irrepressible Jason Statham, England’s greatest export since, I don’t know, Harry Potter and the forced colonization of a decent amount of the world? Don’t you know it’s produced by the utter madman known as Luc Besson?

This movie has all of that.

It also has a kidnapped Asian woman who is quickly attracted to her white knight savior and his pecs of titanium. It’s got every French film stereotype that can be fit into a film of this length, minus, of course, the baguette eating (although maybe that was happening in the background somewhere). It’s got an intense-looking and very rich Asian man pulling the strings above everything. You can rest assured that he’s menacing.

This movie has every damn thing!

Is there a troubling amount of the wrong kind of Asian representation in this film? Who the hell cares, apparently! This was the early 2000’s! Of course, our main actress is going to want to jump Statham within a day or two of meeting him. Who can blame her? I mean, I’m dead serious about Statham’s pecs. Sterling titanium, they are.

I don’t know, a white guy is writing these words. Perhaps it’s not my place to decide what sort of representation is right or wrong for people of Asian descent. There are more and far better people than I that can comment on this subject. Those voices are out there. Go read a book, why don’t ya?

What can I comment on? Well, this is our b-movie bonus episode, and it’s quite a blast, all things considered. There’s a reason they made two additional Statham-led Transporter films. This is the sort of breezy, action-packed movie that filmmakers excelled at making in the early part of this century. There’s very little substance to be found, but what it lacks in story and character development it makes up for in face-punching and skydiving onto movie semi trucks. Yeah, of course that happens! If you didn’t think it would, then you just don’t know what to expect from a film featuring Statham’s oily pecs.

And no, I don’t have an unhealthy obsession with that man’s chest. You have the problem!

Will The Transporter be brilliant, a blunder, or a flunder? Listen on to find out!

(Recorded on May 10, 2021)

Links to Stuff We Mentioned:

The Transporter - IMDb

The Transporter trailer - YouTube

Jason Statham - IMDb

Qi Shu - IMDb

The Meg - IMDb

Luc Besson - IMDb

Léon: The Professional - IMDb

Transporter 2 - IMDb

Transporter 3 - IMDb

The Transporter Refueled - IMDb

Transporter: The Series - IMDb

The Fast and the Furious - IMDb

Fast & Furi

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