Description

In this episode, I will explore common stressors for moms of autistics and why it is important to combat stress.

All parents have stress. Raising an autistic brings on additional stressors. We worry about bullying, if our child will eat enough nutritious food, if they will ever talk, if they will be able to tolerate a public event or stay in the classroom that day. The list goes on!

Safety is a major stressor. It is up there with what will happen to my child when I die. While we have a lot of eventual firsts with our children, we also understand that some milestones may never be met.

It’s just a different journey raising an autistic. I’m usually pretty laid back, but my stress level was through the roof when we learned our son was autistic. I was swallowed whole by all the what ifs. The unknown causes a lot of stress. 

Can moms change the course of their autism journey?

Absolutely! I picked myself up and dusted myself off quickly. I went straight into fight mode. I hear this theme often when I interview and work with moms of autistics. 

We are a unique group! That doesn’t mean we don’t still experience grief and stress. Every mom works through this in their own time.

Some days it feels like we are moving 100 mph and engulfed in stress. It often seems like a normal part of our day to day.

Since stress is inevitable, how do moms of autistics combat stress?

First, you must be aware of stressors. Identify your common stressors by listening to your mind and your body. Your body will give it away every time. 

You might struggle with getting to and staying asleep. This is common. Your sleep might be disrupted. I have two common nightmares related to stress. One is where my teeth keep falling out. The other is that I’m in public and have to go to the bathroom, but all the public toilets are overflowing and not in working order. I have had dreams where I lose my son and can’t find him. 

You might be a stress eater and experience digestive upset or even struggle to eat anything at all. You might have more headaches, panic attacks, or even increased blood pressure. Listen to your body!

Next, you must figure out the origins of your stress. This is usually the easiest step, but it might be more than one thing.

Finally, something must change. You might not have much control over the stressor, but you do have control over how you react to and deal with the issue. 

Tools that Moms of Autistics Can Use to Conquer Stress

1. Be mindful of your thoughts. Catch your stinking thinking and evaluate your mindset. If you have a fixed mindset, that is a red flag! I explore mindset in episode 2, episode 4, and episode 12.
2. How can I use my own strengths to deal with issues that arise? You must be aware of your personal strengths. In my Thrive VIP Program, I help moms identify and use their strengths to up your game and cope with stressful situations. Our strengths act as a buffer and are quite valuable. 
3. What can you do differently? This might be setting better boundaries with others and engaging in self-care. I always say that your own self-care has an impact on your child’s well-being. Self-care is not selfish! 

Give this more thought over the next week. Decide how your body might be giving you stress signals. Consider your potential stressors. And think about what you can do differently to increase your well-being.

If you haven’t already, grab my FREE 4 step guide to help. You can find it as Thriving Moms of Autistics