In this episode, I chat with Tom Bagnall. A successful business owner from the UK, marathon runner and father of two young kids living in Amsterdam
At the beginning of the pandemic he was diagnosed with a stubborn Stage 3 melanoma cancer. He talks about his brutal journey of 7 months of 138 sessions of radiotherapy and immunotherapy and the feeling of helplessness that triggered the need to welcome help into his life.
Some themes we cover are:
- How Team Tom naturally came together to be his help and support network. This provided help on tap from people who simply didn’t take no for an answer.
- His surprising reaction to once being given the all clear, of feeling a big anti-climax, then anger about why me and then a few weeks later once the professional support stopped, quite severely anxious and depressed. And it was during this time and not during the treatment, when he most needed help.
- Tom talks very honestly about how a good friend help him get over his mental block of being a therapy-cynic to eventually seeking and benefitting from life-changing counselling and professional help.
- How his instinct now is to offer help gives him energy, and has made it easier to ask for and accept help.
- We learn how Tom has taken these lessons and used them in way he hadn’t expected.
- We talk about a hypothesis as to why middle-aged men are hard-wired to be resistant to asking for help due to the legacy from our 20s when we need to show we've got our shit together - to be seen as the alpha male and the best potential father for your kids!
- And finally we reveal some hacks about offering help to make it easier to accept.
I hope this conversation helps you as much as it did me.
And that you may share it with a friend, family member or work colleague who may benefit from it too.
You can contact me on:
Email: ashley@thegiftofhelp.org
Facebook: Ashley Usiskin
Instagram: @gift_of_accepting_help_podcast
Linked: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ashleyusiskin/
