Only you are suffering!
We have all been there. That person in the office that just grates on us and who we just see or hear and immediately want to punch them.
I was like this for 10 years with someone until it was pointed out to me that I was the only one suffering. They were completely unaffected by my anger.
I heard analogy recently that said it was like holding on to a piece of hot coal. We complain because it’s burning but we could put it down at any time.
Also what I noticed was that I was mirroring their behaviour. If I thought they were rude, I would end up talking about them behind their back and being rude. If I thought they were lazy I would spend time complaining about them and not doing my work.
My motivation to change was the answer to this question; “Out of all the people in my life did I want them having control of how I felt?” The answer in case you were wondering was “No.”
I then learnt to deal with that anger and understand where it came from. Our relationship is now very different and for the better.
It doesn’t mean that I let them off the hook when I think they are out of order, but I can address it from compassion rather than anger.
Why would I do that? Simple. Only I feel my emotions and I want to choose how I feel and respond, not give that away to someone else.
If you need help moving out of that state of anger then book a free strategy call:
https://CoachingwithJonnyBevan.as.me/Strategy-Call
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