But for real... we unknowingly allow idealism to murder our motivation by keeping us frozen. Sometimes it appears saying we're waiting to show up with excellence before taking action, but when you peel back that layer- is it actually stealing from us or serving us.
How-to combat Idealism
1) notice chronic feelings of disappointment/failure
2) increase awareness that thats usually evidence of unrealistic expectations
(aka-idealism)
3) examine your expectations
HABIT TO EXAMINE YOUR EXPECTATIONS.
Ask yourself the following questions
- What were my expectations here? (of myself or situation) Take a few minutes to sit with yourself to flush out these answers. They're probably all subconscious & nothing you actually vocalized beforehand.
- What did I actually do? (list what you did do/happened & notice the factors beyond your control at play & be aware of your own limits)
- Were my inital expectations realistic? (Honestly assess what you expected -vs- how long it took & the factors outside of your control.)
- Did I spend my time well? (Consider the effort you put in with your current skills & those factors. Remember perfect isn't the standard here.)
- Could I say I was successful even if I didn't hit my initial expectations? ( This will require you to redefine what success means. You might not have 100% fit your ideal outcome, but being "successful" is a wider/broader net.
- Do you owe yourself an apology? I often do this when I realize I was shaming my efforts based on unattainable standards?
- Can you give yourself gratitude for the effort you put in? Behavioral Scientist have found that we change more quickly when we choose to be proud of yourself even when we are only marginally better. If we embrace the learning curve, we arrive at mastery faster.
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