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Season 2 Episode 14: Breaking the News: How to Talk to Kids About Divorce
Divorce conversations rank among parents' most dreaded responsibilities. Many couples delay separation for months or even years, fearing the impact on their children. This powerful episode tackles the question therapists hear most often: "How do we tell our kids?"
Starting with the foundation of presenting a united front, we explore why having both parents present for this conversation matters deeply. Children need to see that despite the end of the marriage, their parents remain committed to their wellbeing. We share practical guidance on gathering siblings together, preparing logistically, and using language that matches each child's developmental understanding.
One critical message emerges repeatedly throughout our discussion: children must understand they did not cause the divorce. Due to their developmental stage, young children especially tend to internalize blame for family changes - a phenomenon called "false causation fallacy." We share personal examples of how this manifests and provide language for addressing this misperception compassionately.
The conversation extends beyond the initial discussion, emphasizing that divorce communication represents an ongoing dialogue rather than a one-time event. We recommend regular check-ins, acknowledging that siblings may process the news differently, and identifying additional supportive adults who can provide stability during the transition period. Most importantly, we stress that protecting children's relationships with both parents serves as the cornerstone of healthy adjustment.
What parents often discover after careful preparation is that these conversations, while undeniably difficult, rarely prove as catastrophic as feared. With intention, compassion, and ongoing support, families navigate this transition while preserving what matters most: children's sense of security and their continued relationships with both parents. Leave us a review and share your experiences with navigating difficult family conversations.
Dr. Jenna and Dr. Nari are the Licensed Marriage and Family Therapists behind the Coupled Podcast. They both have private practices where they work with individuals, couples, and families in Florida. The two are ready to shake up the world of couples therapy and want to extend resources beyond the couples they see in their private practices.
If you like this episode and want to know more about taking the next step to improve your communication, connection, and intimacy, head over to our websites to learn more about our Staying Coupled and Getting Coupled courses. These online courses give you the flexibility to improve your relationship from the comfort and convenience of your home. The Staying Coupled course is for couples who want to do the work to connect, communicate, and have the healthiest relationship possible. The Getting Coupled course is for premarital couples wanting to learn the essentials for a successful marriage. Topics in both courses include the main issues couples face:
For more information, visit drjennascott.com/courses or drnarijeter.com/courses
Disclaimer: This podcast is not a substitute for therapy. If you’re struggling, we encourage you to seek support from a licensed therapist in your state. Our relationship suggestions and content may not be applicable or advised for relationships with intimate partner violence (IPV). If you need resources, contact the Na
