A year after losing Liam, we realize something simple and unsettling: the calendar moves on even when your body does not. We sit down to talk through the anniversary we didn’t fully name out loud at the time, and why bringing it back now matters for our family, our marriage, and our kids. This is a raw conversation about child loss, grief, and what remembrance looks like when you’re still parenting, still working, still healing.
We share the night-before moment we’d avoided for a full year: opening Liam’s urn. We talk about the shock of how “small” ashes feel compared to a whole human, how kids hold curiosity alongside sadness, and how grief processing can deepen in layers when you least expect it. We also tell a story from our past that explains why dark humor sometimes shows up in the middle of heartbreak, not as disrespect, but as survival.
Then we take you to the beach. The plan is to surf out and spread Liam’s ashes at lineup, but the waves are huge and reality hits fast. We adapt, we make wishes, we include the kids in a safe way, and we let the day unfold into breakfast memories, photos on the couch, and a long family walk at sunset. We also reflect on a fear many bereaved parents carry: forgetting the sensory parts of your child, and how busyness can quietly steal that connection. If you’re navigating baby loss, parenting after loss, or looking for grief rituals that feel real, we hope this helps.
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