Ever wondered why building communities often leads to deeper divisions? In this special follow-up to our conversation with Peter Rollins, we explore a radical alternative to traditional community-building that might change how you think about human connection forever.
Rollins draws a crucial distinction between three forms of social bonds. Communities form around shared identities, beliefs, and especially shared enemies—inherently creating insiders and outsiders. The commons are spaces where different people mix freely, but these public spaces are diminishing in our society. Most provocatively, Rollins introduces the concept of communion—a social bond formed when we acknowledge our shared status as outsiders, connecting through our universal human experience of alienation rather than through shared beliefs or enemies.
"What makes communion different from community is that it is also forged on lack, on some impossibility, but it is not externalized on a scapegoat," Rollins explains. Instead, we recognize the lack within ourselves and find connection through this shared vulnerability. Using examples from Alcoholics Anonymous to family therapy, he demonstrates how this shift from blaming external forces to acknowledging our own implication in our struggles creates the possibility for genuine connection across deep differences.
For those seeking practical applications, Rollins suggests creating "Death of God Supper Clubs"—circle gatherings where people can openly acknowledge their outsider status and speak authentically. Unlike typical community groups organized around shared beliefs, these spaces allow us to encounter each other as "creatures of desire, creatures of longing, creatures of yearning, creatures who suffer."
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