Conflict already exists every time team members gather for a meeting. The goal is to get all the conflicting opinions and perspectives out on the table and to make a decision that everyone is comfortable committing to. Conflict norms are an incredibly effective way of making sure that happens, and in this episode Jim and Margot will share 5 specific conflict norms to consider implementing on your team.
Example 1: Real-Time Permission
§ A team member interrupts discussion in real time to point out positive behaviour and reinforce it for the whole group.
§ Helps reinforce what is and is not helpful/acceptable as difficult topics are discussed.
Example 2: Removing the Back Door
§ Once a decision has been made, it’s not acceptable to approach the leader later and present more information in order for the decision to be re-evaluated.
§ Helps reinforce that people need to come to meetings prepared and speak up while the discussion is happening so time can be used effectively.
Example 3: Silence Equals Disagreement
§ Assume that if people haven’t voiced their opinion, it’s not because they just agree with what’s being said—assume that they disagree and ask them to weigh in.
§ Helps reinforce that everyone needs to weigh in and keeps decisions from being made without everyone’s commitment.
Example 4: Roman Council
§ Call out the potential decision to be made, and everyone holds out their hands with a thumbs up (yes, go ahead), a thumbs down (no, I’m not committed to this), or thumbs sideways (I need to understand more before I can decide).
§ Gives opportunity for a quick visual gauge on the level of commitment to a direction, and can save meeting time.
Example 5: Fist-to-Five
§ Call out the potential decision to be made, everyone holds out their fists, and the leader counts, “One, two, SHOW”. Each team member displays: all five fingers (totally committed, go ahead), four fingers (okay to go ahead), three fingers (not in DISagreement, go ahead), and two fingers or one finger or a fist means there is not agreement and discussion needs to continue.
§ Gives more nuance than a simple “yes, no, maybe”; if everyone has 3s, 4s, or 5s, you might save meeting time because actually everyone is prepared to move forward on the decision.
Other conflict norms to consider:
§ What level/kind of emotional display is helpful and accepted in our discussions?
§ How should strong language be (or not be) used in our discussions?
§ When should a conversation include the whole team versus happen between only certain team members?
§ What body language/behaviour is NOT acceptable in our meetings during heated discussion?
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Let us know if you have follow-up questions about this episode or other leadership team and organizational health topics! We will plan them into future episodes.
Listen at:
Apple Podcasts - apple.co/2vwAY59
Spotify - spoti.fi/36xgtlp
Stitcher - bit.ly/2O6DCVo
Connect with the hosts:
Jim Brown’s LinkedIn - http://bit.ly/2Fqs9LU
Margot Thompson’s LinkedIn - http://bit.ly/2FvFJh2
As always, you can listen to more and read more at www.orghealth.coach, subscribe for email updates, or follow us on social media.
