Today’s episode covers something that pretty much everyone will go through at one time or another in their lives; conflict in relationships. It is often joked about that opposites attract and a common difference that creates that opposition is contrasting approaches to life. One partner may look at things from a fact-based viewpoint while another may come from a more emotional perspective. Really, there is no right and wrong, but these differing positions can certainly create conflict! When that happens, what do you do? Local counselor, Mary Lambrecht, hopes to answer that question in today’s discussion. Mary is a Texas and Wisconsin State-licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who is passionate about helping couples learn healthy habits and patterns in communication and conflict resolution. With Mary, partners and families learn how core differences, family-of-origin patterns, and emotional wiring affect their respect and understanding of the other and, in this episode, you’ll hear about some of the helpful (and healthy) tools she teaches for communicating, understanding, and addressing conflict better. Tune in today to find out more!
Key Points From This Episode:
- An introduction to Mary Lambrecht and her practice as a marriage and family therapist.
- Hear about the differences between facts and feelings, logic and emotions.
- Why you might be more fact or feeling-oriented, from genetics to environmental factors.
- What would be helpful for a fact-oriented person to know in order to better understand and connect with their feeling-oriented partner.
- Understanding that efforts go a long way when we are hardwired differently.
- You don’t have to fully understand your partner’s viewpoint in order to step into their shoes.
- How trauma can compound conflict and cause heightened anxiety for feeling-oriented people.
- Find out how it plays out if this anxiety goes unrecognized; a common response is to step back or withdraw completely.
- How fact-oriented people can use cues to convey their feelings, dreams, and priorities.
- Tips for navigating these differences when they arise: extending the hand of grace.
- Remember that being fact-oriented or feeling-oriented isn’t wrong or right, just different!
- If you detect confusion in your partner, it’s up to you to clarify what you’re thinking or feeling.
- How to know if you need couple’s counseling: if you keep getting stuck in the same conflict.
- Ending on a story of hope: how two partners respected and made room for each other’s fact or feeling orientation, perspectives, and needs.
- Why there is no task or interaction too small to be significant regarding honor and respect.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Mary Lambrecht, LMFT on LinkedIn
Family Help Counseling & Seminars
Dr. Brent Atkinson
The Couples Clinic
Dr. Susan Johnson
The Gottman Method
The Gottman Institute
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
LoveNudge App
Emotional Intelligence in Couples Therapy
The Body Keeps the Score
