In this episode called 'Take This Co-dependency Quiz' I take on the myth that the addiction is owned exclusively by the alcoholic or addict and therefore the family must focus its energy on their loved one. We conclude the following instead:
- Most, if not all, family members of an alcoholic or addict become dysfunctional when living with the disorder. That is why it is called a family disease.
- Family members therefore become co-dependent. A co-dependent person is one who has let another’s behaviour affect him or her, and who is obsessed with controlling that person’s behaviour.
- All who are thus affected do not yet understand that recovery lies not with the other person, rather that it lies “within ourselves”.
- Therefore, the truth of what Al Anon and recovery professionals claim becomes liberating: “Didn’t cause it, can’t control it, can’t cure it”.
- Knowing we are not alone and that there are countless people who share the same problem and stand ready to help with a solution to restore your sanity should be liberating, too.
