If you’ve ever called yourself a “low-maintenance friend” but secretly crave deeper connection… this conversation is for you.
We talk about…
-Why the “low-maintenance” trend quietly excuses neglect.
-Loneliness as an epidemic—and how we’re drifting from community.
-Medium-maintenance friendships: presence, checking in, reciprocity.
-Healthy effort vs. toxic draining (discernment matters).
-Behavior checks: stop flaking, raise emotional awareness, be curious.
-Life stages & growing apart: naming why connection feels harder now.
-Faith lens: God gave us each other—community is sacred stewardship.
Let’s go Beneath The Seams!
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00:00 Coming Up!
00:24 Beneath The Seams manifesto (why we go below the surface)
01:40 Welcome back — what this space is & why this topic now
03:02 The trend: why “I don’t require much” is quietly isolating us
05:05 Maintenance analogies: nails, car, faith → relationships
06:42 Personal truth: feeling detached despite having “friends”
09:18 Growing apart as life changes (distance, kids, routines)
11:06 The danger of “low” settings → from monthly to yearly to… strangers
12:55 Naming what you need: depth as a love language
15:08 Loneliness online & IRL; post-pandemic isolation habits
17:10 Healthy effort vs. toxic draining (use discernment)
18:36 The medium-maintenance baseline:
20:28 Presence IRL & putting the phone down
21:44 Reciprocity confession: “Do I have friends because I maintain them?”
23:12 Follow the nudge: when someone crosses your mind, call/text
24:35 The “365-day rule”: are we still friends if we haven’t spoken in a year?
26:04 “Maturity” as a mask for neglect
27:22 Faith lens: Genesis 2:18, Proverbs 27:17, disciples lived *together*
29:05 Behavior checks: stop flaking; the cost of community is inconvenience
31:02 Emotional awareness & curiosity: be in your friends’ business (lovingly)
32:28 Personal commitment: leave the house more; invite community in
34:00 Open invite: are you isolated or thriving in friendship?
35:12 Reviews/help the show grow + share with a friend
36:05 Closing blessing — and see you next week
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Resources & Scriptures Mentioned
Genesis 2:18 — “It is not good that man should be alone.”
Proverbs 27:17 — “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.”
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Let's stay connected...
/ kalariggins
I’m Kala! Host, content creator, and storyteller.
I create content and conversations that inspire women to stop hiding, stop apologizing, and show up as their full selves.
Here, we talk about the messy middle of life and creativity — the doubt, the breakthroughs, the moments that make you want to quit, and the ones that keep you going. (all while looking GOODt!)
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Connect with me:
Podcast Website: [https://beneaththeseams.com/](https://beneaththeseams.com/)
Instagram + TikTok @kalariggins
Contact:Kala@KalaRiggins.com]
