How do you honour difficult parents? What does biblical respect look like when your mum won't accept you're an adult, or your dad's choices have caused genuine hurt?
Jenny Mariner brings twelve years of teaching teenagers and raising two young children to this honest exploration of one of the Bible's most challenging commands. She unpacks the crucial difference between childhood obedience (temporary) and honour (permanent), offering practical wisdom for navigating complicated family dynamics with grace.
In this conversation, we explore:
Jenny shares a powerful story from her teaching years about a student who wouldn't obey anyone, constantly wandering corridors and disrupting others.
"This child is not learning how to function in society. That is what learning obedience when you are young is about - none of us get to do whatever we want all the time."
What we discover:
Key takeaway: Obedience isn't about crushing personality - it's about learning that healthy societies need structure.
Jenny makes the crucial distinction many of us miss about what changes when we become adults.
"The overall key point in a nutshell is that obedience is important in childhood and honour remains a permanent obligation throughout our lives - whatever the dynamics in your family."
Understanding the difference:
Key takeaway: You don't have to obey your parents as an adult, but you're still called to honour them.
Jenny gets practical about what honouring parents means in everyday life.
"Honouring in the Bible is about treating someone with proper respect and value. It's about saying, you are my parent. You birthed me, you raised me. You did your best, even if actually your best was inadequate."
Practical ways to honour:
Key takeaway: Honour is active, not passive - it requires intentional choices about how we treat our parents.
Jenny challenges the false idea that honouring means having no boundaries.
"Despite everything I've said about honour and communication and respect and care, it is okay, it's biblical to have healthy boundaries."
Real talk about boundaries:
