Episode 157 What if Nothing is Wrong with You?
Happy 2020 my people! I know the new year is all about resolutions and what we can do to improve just a bit, and there’s plenty of time for that, but what do you think of the idea that we are pretty darn impressive just the way we are. What if nothing was wrong with you? I know….what if there really was nothing wrong with you and you just accepted that. How would that settle into your heart?
Stay tuned for today’s episode on self love, self acceptance, and the novel idea that we are acceptable here and now, just as we are. In fact we are more than acceptable – we are beloved and filled with magic.
Since loving ourselves creates the foundation for loving our story – this topic is ideal for the Love Your Story podcast, so I wanted to pose the question to you – What if there is nothing wrong with you?
I first heard this statement from Susan Henkel’s TED Talk, part of the “How to Be a Better Human” series, so let’s start there…
Susan Henkels has worked as a psychotherapist for more than 45 years. That means she’s spent decades smiling and nodding, decades handing over tissues at the appropriate moment — and decades hearing people tell her all the things about themselves that need to be fixed.
One day, as she was listening to a patient take her through the “whole list of what was wrong with her,” says Henkels, “I thought in the middle of this litany, ‘What? There’s actually nothing wrong with her.’”
From that moment, she realized there is a surprising power to be found in prompting people to ask themselves, “What if there’s nothing wrong with me?”
She says, This does not mean we’re perfect. For instance, most of us could stand to eat better and sit up straighter. But we can stop spending so much time dwelling on our personal shortcomings and imagining how our lives will be better once we finally — finally! — vanquish them. “We create this whole list of what we think is wrong and then create an entire life around it,”
In fact, the attributes we think of as problems can be our strengths. Henkels tells this story in her TedX talk.
“What if there’s nothing wrong with you?” is about building the skill of acceptance. Henkels says this question is about pressing pause on your inner critic and making “a choice to let go of all the ways you’ve made yourself wrong,” as she puts it.
Tune into the audio program to hear a clip of this Ted talk.
As you look at your own level of self love, let’s start with these questions. 1. What if there’s nothing wrong with you? And as you start to categorize that favorite list of short comings – ask yourself – What’s wrong with that? Really…could your perceived weakness really be a strength?
Let me share a story. I shared this in an earlier podcast, but it applies here so I’ll share it again. Last year I was at a women’s empowerment conference. One of the activities we were doing involved consideration of how who we are and our natural tendencies helps us to fulfill our callings – the things we are here to do. In other words, I am equipped to do what I am here to do. As I personally considered a topic I have often been criticized for and thus I have interpreted it as a weakness – that of being strong willed, determined, and sometimes pushy, it struck me that perhaps I am okay just as I am – perhaps that strength was given to me to accomplish what I need to accomplish. Perhaps I have a warrior goddess energy rather than a healing goddess energy or a sweet, compliant goddess energy because I will have battles I need to fight through, and there is definitely a place for the guardians and warrior goddesses, as much as there is a place for the goddesses of mercy, kindness and a more docile energy. This was the first time this has ever...
