Intro: Today’s culture is moving away from marriage covenants. That’s moving in the wrong direction. Godly young men should start thinking and praying about their future wives.
- Describe the attitude toward marriage that young men have today. Where do you think that attitude comes from?
Marriage Is a Good Thing
- Our spouse is a help mate from God
- Genesis 2:18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.”
- Proverbs 18:22 The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the Lord.
- Married my best friend: Post Honeymoon/first year life together. Proverbs 31 She challenges me to grow deeper in my faith. Yesterday’s interaction, encouragement and questions
- (John Piper: “The Divine calling of a wife is to honor and affirm her husband’s leadership and help him carry through according to her gifts”....Every guy knows he needs a helper)
- Tactical viewpoint:: The best flight leads know when to have their wingman take the tactical lead of the formation
- Our spouse is just right. Their strengths and weaknesses complement our strengths and weaknesses. Their femininity works together with our masculinity
- Sacred Marriage: Eugenia isn't just my wife; she is also God’s Daughter and I must treat accordingly. If you want to get on my good side, be good to my kids, and vice versa
- Tactically speaking (Wingman Concept): Ecclesiastes 4:12: A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but TWO can stand back to back and conquer. Three are even better for a triple braided cord is not easily broken.
- Marriage sanctifies us and helps us to look more like Jesus
- Ephesians 5:25 For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her 26 to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word.
- Marriage is your first ministry. When the world sees a God honoring marriage, one that honors each other, one that is submissive and sacrificial, the world will question “why”. Marriage is a reflection of Christ’s relationship with the Church. Husband represents “Christ’s” role and the wife represents the “Church” role. When I stand before the Lord, I desire to have a wife that is honoring to the Lord, empowered, secure, and confident; and Children who love the Lord, feel loved by me. Versus, having accomplished all these wonderful achievements in my life, career, and even “ministry” yet have lost my children to the world and a bitter and angry wife to me.
- Marriage helps battle sexual immorality
- 1 Corinthians 7:9 But if they can’t control themselves, they should go ahead and marry. It’s better to marry than to burn with lust.
Contentment vs Passivity
- We’re not saying single is bad. God can use us in ways when we’re single that he likely won’t once we’re married. Single is not less than.
- 1 Corinthians 7:32 I want you to be free from the concerns of this life. An unmarried man can spend his time doing the Lord’s work and thinking how to please him. 33 But a married man has to think about his earthly responsibilities and how to please his wife.
- Marriage can be an idol in our life when we make it the most important thing
- Philippians 4:11-13 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength.
- Marriage and your wife is not to be your primary focus/idol; the Lord is. If you focus on God, she will love you more. It will be easy for her to “submit”/ respect to your leadership because you are sacrificing your desires for hers as you become more sacrificial as Christ was/is and as you submit to His authority (3 braided rope).
- It’s one thing to be single and content; it’s something else to be single and passive. The calling to leadership starts by taking the initiative in pursuing a wife.
- Leading as a husband— first leadership opportunity after leading ourselves for most and the first person most get to unconditionally love (Romans 8:38-39), live selflessly for (Phil 2:3), sacrifice for (John 3:16), become a tender warrior for (Col 3:19) and serve (Mark 10:45) as Christ did.
- Don’t fear rejection. When we know who we are in Christ and we know what the God of the universe says about us, rejection isn’t that big of a deal.
What Should I be Looking for?
- Most of us don’t have the benefit of being told exactly where to go or from which family we should seek our wife like the characters in the OT
- Proverbs 31:30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised.
- See also: The 30 scale
- Be on mission together
