Ganel-Lyn had a mom and sister who struggled with mental health challenges, and her sister finally chose suicide. She shares key tips and ideas for both family members and those who struggle.
Episode Discussion Points
- We all need connection with others.
- Getting ready for empty-nesting and entering a new phase is challenging (and she is kind of mourning that change).
- Wishes she knew more about parenting adult children
- How when she was a young mom it was so hard and so slow, and now that her kids are grown she feels like it sped by in the blink of an eye.
- She is blessed to have a very busy life outside of mothering that will keep her busy now.
- She has given herself permission to go back to therapy and not have everything planned and sorted out (which is new for her).
- The blocks analogy of life through this life transition.
- How she is a perfectionist “in recovery” who used to think if she was perfect she could fix those around her and protect them from their challenges.
- She grew up with a desire to put things in order.
Dealing with Mental Health & Suicide
- She has a mom who deals with severe mental health issues, and a sister died by suicide.
- Suicide grief is difficult and complex to deal with, and helped her realize the importance of accepting the parts of her that are broken.
- Jesus is the only one who can save. “I am not responsible for saving someone else.”
- “Everyone on the planet either struggles with mental health or loves someone who does.”
- “Every day I wake up and I check in with my mental health.”
- “Suicide is really bad exhaustion of the soul,” where they think the world would be better off without them, and wanting the pain of the soul to stop.
- “Hope is doing the next plan B.” You have been through hard things before and you will get through this hard thing now.
- For those struggling with pain, find the tool that will work that day.
- Choose to stay in your body. “Suicide changes your other choices.”
- “I love Therapy! It is education for your mind and your relationships.”
How to Help Loved Ones with Mental Health Challenges
- Ask a middle age man how he is doing (and do show you with emojis).
- “The opposite of addiction is connection.” So watch for loved ones who isolate.
- Have a list of 5 “SOS friends” you can call when you are in crisis. These are people you love and trust, and you have planned that you can call/text when you are in need. These are people who have gone through hard times.
- Ask friends in need, “What does support look like for you?”
- Often people just need to be heard--go on a walk or drive with them and just listen.
- What do they need? Drop of dry cleaning? Go to a movie?
- You only need 1-2 really good support people.
- If you feel you don’t have anyone, go to God and ask Him who needs you? “There is a resiliency skill in service.”
The Stewardship Principle
- Her new book The Stewardship Principle—everything we own or experience—God is asking us to watch over it, not own it.
- Stewardship vs. Ownership principles and what it looks like.
- Don’t compare—we each have different stewardships!
- Gratitude for “hard times” which now she gives back as “offerings.”
- Often the people you show up for, show up for you.
- “if we are to receive all that [God] has, our capacity has to increase.”
Mental Health Checkup Ideas
- Therapy: If you haven’t found a good therapist, post on social media and find one that works for you. This can include talk therapy, EMDR (helps with trauma), massage therapy (which she does regularly), Light...
