In this episode, Choosing Not to Fight, host Johnny Guidry examines the concept of “do no harm,” why it makes sense to turn the other cheek, and 4 foundational steps for any spiritual seeker aspiring to forgive and find acceptance when we are hurting.
Learn more about Johnny at www.RefractiveCoaching.com and www.RefractivePodcast.com.
For similarly-themed episodes, try The Ancient Truths of Acceptance & PLINKO, If I’m Angry w/You the Problem Is Me, and Spiritual Healing through Toxic Relationships w/Jean Atman.
Reach Johnny G at RefractivePodcast@Gmail.com.
Episode transcript:
Welcome to a new episode of Refractive. I’m your host, Johnny G. Look, I’m sitting here in this amazing office and I have this enormous mug of herbal tea and I have this incredible candle basil and green tea scented candle. And look, if anybody tells you I’m not living my best life, you can tell them they are mistaken. So. I’m just full of gratitude, and I’m glad for you showing up to listen to another episode, and I hope that today this message will resonate.I had a conversation a few weeks back with a friend of mine, and he is young, queer, Hispanic. He’s soft spoken. He has a nose ring. And he was telling me about a particular incident that had happened a few days before, he walked into a supermarket. And just after passing through the front door, there was another customer who was an older guy, this older white guy, and he looked at him and in a joking, loud way said, Hey fella, it looks like you got something in your nose. So commenting on his nose ring like that. And he talked about how hard it was to Be surprised like that by that comment, to be shocked and to realize that other people are looking at him and that he might not fit this mainstream definition of what a-I don’t know what a a certain type of person is going to look like. And it was it was hard for him. It threw him into a bit of a of a frustration. Now, to give you some context, this friend of mine, I told you he’s Hispanic. He was raised in a traditional conservative Christian home. I said also that he is he’s not straight and that created some, I’ll just say complexity for him growing up and also white people and white culture played an outsized role in this person’s development as a kid. More so than perhaps in some other examples. And so he’s sensitive to how he fits into the white world and the mainstream world and the straight world and the conservative world. And it’s just a very loaded experience for him. And so this comment identifying him as “other,” as not normal. It was really triggering for him and it made him feel so uncomfortable. And I have to say that The idea of being publicly and passive aggressively put into a box that you don’t want to be in by a stranger In front of other strangers, That’s a hard experience to go through. And even if this person was teasing or joking, maybe it wasn’t direct, really aggressive and hateful language. But it’s humiliating and it’s meant to draw attention how different you are from me and what I see as normal. You are not mainstream. I am mainstream. And therefore it’s OK for me to publicly comment on how different you are and to make it a joke. And there will be no consequences for me to make this joke....
