Parent Driven Development
Episode 039: Parenting Roles and Gender Equality with Richard Schneeman
Welcome Richard Schneeman (https://www.schneems.com/)!
Schneems (https://twitter.com/schneems) writes Ruby at Heroku, and maintains CodeTriage.com, a tool for helping people contribute to Open Source. He is in the top 50 Rails contributors and is an accidental maintainer of Sprockets and Puma. When he isn't obsessively compulsively refactoring code for performance, he writes such gems as Wicked, and derailed_benchmarks.
00:30 Welcome, Richard Schneeman!
01:00 All the Rage: Mothers, Fathers and the Myth of Equal Partnership
The book: All the Rage: Mothers Fathers and the Myth of Equal Partnership (https://amzn.to/3jNGKnn)
Co-parenting, gender equality
Progressive relationships default into gender roles after kids
05:18 Progressive Parenting
What’s fair?
Progressive until they have to make a change..
08:15 Moms vs. Dads
Dad’s get applauded when caring for children in public
Creating boundaries of designated mom and dad jobs with the kids
10:50 Visible Work vs. Invisble Work
How to balance and create boundaries between partners
RSVP’s - CC’d emails, response, birthday presents, who’s responsible?
Coding pairs and how they relate
17:01 How to Define Who is Responsible?
Create a system
The mentorship manner
Not only doing what is asked, but proactively taking steps
21:15 Meta Tasks
Partners double checking each others work, basically twice the work!
Micro managing
25:30 Calendar System
Shared task and to-do lists
Bringing work management systems into home management systems; Learning AGILE (https://amzn.to/30a16Qe)
Schedule a weekly meeting with your partner to go over shared cared
Check the calendar!
31:01 Genius / Fail moments
Josh’s daughter gets her hair dyed and it looks great, but her new conditioner leaks the blue color from her hair all over the bathroom! #fail
Chris coordinates Grandpa time to give his wife more free time #genius
Richard’s son glues his favorite picture on his bedroom wall, with handwritten marker too #geniusfail
Allison has a genius in Sweden with her two young children
All the Rage: Mothers, Father, and the Myth of Equal Partnership (https://amzn.to/3jNGKnn)
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Panel
Allison McMillan (https://twitter.com/allie_p)
Chris Arcand (https://twitter.com/chrisarcand)
Josh Puetz (https://twitter.com/joshpuetz) Special Guest: Richard Schneeman .
