What does it mean to be fetishized—and how do you turn that gaze back on the culture that created it? Estelle Erasmus chats with Kaila Yu, a freelance writer whose work has appeared in The Los Angeles Times, Rolling Stone, The New York Times, Business Insider, Condé Nast Traveler, and more. Before turning to journalism, Kaila was a model and the lead singer of the all-Asian American female rock band Nylon Pink. Her debut memoir, Fetishized: A Reckoning with Yellow Fever, Feminism, and Beauty (Crown Publishing, Penguin Random House), braids cultural critique with personal narrative to examine identity, representation, and the male gaze.

In this episode:

• Growing up in the “pornified” 2000s and how it shaped beauty ideals and agency
• The “ABG” (Asian Baby Girl) aesthetic, model-minority myths, and resisting stereotypes
• Structuring a memoir-in-essays using cultural archetypes (Geisha, Butterfly, China Doll, “Not Lucy Liu,” etc.)
• Weaving research (colonial histories, media analysis) into lived experience
• Gen Z, #MeToo, and why we need cultural reckonings now, not 20 years later
• Life after entertainment: choosing writing for longevity and self-definition

Watch on YouTube: https://youtu.be/4hAi3MN_Png

Order her book on Estelle’s Bookshop

https://bookshop.org/p/books/fetishized-a-reckoning-with-yellow-fever-feminism-and-beauty-kaila-yu/212b9185f28e897d?aid=98827&ean=9780593728017&listref=authors-who-have-appeared-on-freelance-writing-direct&next=t

Connect with Kaila

Website: https://KailaYu.com

Instagram: https://instagram.com/KailaYu

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 New Essay:

Read my latest essay on Another Jane Pratt Thing. It Happened to Me: I Deliberately Ruined My Nasty Co-Worker's Wedding Video.

I loved telling my story all these years later. And don't miss the episode with Jane #155, where we dished all about Sassy, XoJane and more.

TEDx Talk: How to Get Noticed in Your Writing and Beyond
In my talk I blend personal storytelling with actionable strategies for standing out—starting with a chaotic moment involving Thomas the Tank Engine.
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