On today’s episode of Revitalized Womanhood: To The Core, Gina talks all about defensiveness in relationships, and how to combat and talk about it. She gives her own examples and why it occurs, before giving a list of advice on how to talk to your partner about being defensive in arguments:
See the detailed show notes and timestamps below for more information.
Join the Revitalized Sisterhood
Connect with Gina Trimmer on Instagram
Join the Free Revitalized Womanhood Facebook Community
(2:55) Defensiveness comes from an over or underdeveloped protective instinct, which Gina explains.
(5:30) To give an example, Gina shares her own experiences trying to be defensive in her marriage.
(8:55) Defensiveness can also occur in partnerships when one person is asking for their needs to be met, and the other responds immediately with self defense.
(13:35) Withholding sex is another response to defensiveness.
(16:20) In a message to the gentlemen, Gina encourages a membership to the Revitalized Sisterhood as a gift for their partners.
(19:25) Her first piece of advice in talking to somebody who’s being defensive, is to talk to them in a non accusatory way.
(21:15) Ask your partner how you can be better at asking for your needs to be met, and be aware of your body language.
(23:30) Know the message you want to send very clearly before talking to your partner.
(25:00) Gina explains the concept of a builder, which involves building up to the situation you want to talk about.
(28:10) Gina explains brain dumping, which is a technique for anxiety that she learned from a girl in her sisterhood.