Welcome to Weirdos in the Workplace, where we talk about creating environments where we're learning together to increase our impact in the world through developing servant leadership, creative cultures, and high-performing diverse teams, among many other things.
I'm your host, Erin Patchell, my quest is to turn business philosophy into business fact, and today's episode is on fitting like a piece of the puzzle.
Last week we talked about finding a space where we belong. I mentioned a quote from Brene Brown and another from Simon Sinek describing belonging as not fitting in but about being authentic and being able to be ourselves. Now I'd like to detangle the nuance a little bit because sometimes that statement feels a little bit like semantics. What's the difference between belonging and fitting in? We could fit into a space where it feels natural so that we will explore that a little bit. I recently had a very cool experience that I want to share with you, where it felt natural to both fit in and stand in.
Stay tuned.
A couple of months ago, I applied to attend the Ted Conference in Vancouver. I'm sure you're all familiar with Ted Talks Ted X. So, Ted puts on this really big conference every year, and that's where a lot of their material comes from. The theme this year, 2023 was a possibility, which for me is probably, you know, the best thing ever because that's all I think about is what if, what if, what if?
It was only three months into my new adventure as a small business owner and an entrepreneur, and it felt like a fairly big risk because it was a fairly reasonably sized investment. It was an investment in myself, and I was and I'm currently still in an exploratory phase of my new venture.
So, I was going to get inspiration, meet some new people, and learn something about myself, and I thought, hey, sounds like a good idea.
Immediately when I arrived at the Ted Conference on Sunday evening last Sunday evening, I was greeted by a very warm, lovely Ted team member who ushered me through into the lobby at the stairs and provided me with a gift and a name tag lanyard.
Very high-tech lanyard. Let's say, and then, of course, I desperately snuck into the bathroom immediately and recomposed myself because if you haven't, if you don't know by now, I have a lot of anxiety and social anxiety, and so, I had made it. I had, I had, I had achieved the milestone of getting into the building. I had received my bag, and I needed to go and hide for a minute to compose myself, so that's what I did. I found a bathroom I composed myself. I looked in my bag to see what was in their perk bag. I tried to get myself to stop sweating, and then once I had composed myself, I went back into the lobby and stood around waiting for what was the next event for people who were new. At the Ted Conference, people had never been there before now, like any good extrovert, and you'll probably be surprised by the fact that I have such high anxiety that I am also an extrovert. It's a very interesting combination.
I found one person like me who was standing around and started talking to them, and then I talked to another person, and then I talked to another person, and every single person I talked to in that lobby was brilliant, curious, curious about me as I was curious about them, intelligent and had some special interest and reason for being there, of course, and that experience did set the stage, I think, for the entire rest of the week because it enabled me to feel comfortable.
Every single person that I met was so welcoming and so interesting that it was really easy to both fit in and stand out.The entire event was, I thought, catered to people like me who had a huge diversity of interests and ways
of thinking.
Still, as a very anxious girl from rural Ontario, I've talked a little bit about my anxiety. Therefore, I have social anxiety, and it's sometimes pretty crippling.
I can usually stand to be in a place for a little while, and then I literally have to leave like I have to cut and run. I'm the same way in almost every social situation, like in restaurants and concerts. I can usually withstand it for a little while, but as soon as the thing is over, I'm out the door. I am not even kidding—people who know me will know that at restaurants, I will ask for our bill even as the food is coming because I want to know that as soon as I am done eating, I have already paid for it, and I can literally get up and leave. I don't want to dilly-dally around anyways. I did feel some of that at the Ted Conference because I carry it everywhere. It wasn't even remotely as pronounced as it normally was, and I think that is because of three different things I observed. The first thing is there, the environment; the second thing Is the ability to flow; and the third thing is the people.
In terms of fitting like a piece of the puzzle.
To me, fitting like a piece of the puzzle is what enables us to understand each other, collaborate effectively, communicate, and be authentic. I've spent my whole life trying to be a chameleon. Many folks out there also resonate with that, trying to figure out how to best fit into a particular environment while still feeling whole and authentic and not feeling like I needed to wear a mask all the time. I felt like that at the Ted Conference. This is a good context to help articulate and understand how we can build environments and organizations where that comes together.
So, let's start with the first thing, which was the environment at the Ted Conference, which was a very large space for the number of people that were there, so there was lots of room to move around.
They did an amazing job of basically setting up little conversation areas or work areas throughout the entire building on multiple levels.
Many of them also had simulcast areas as well, baked within them, and so if you didn't feel comfortable or if you needed to work while you were watching the Ted talks, you didn't have to go into the, the, the, the bigger arena space where they're being held.
More importantly, if it's all about energy management for folks with anxiety, folks, anybody, we’re all of us. It's literally that we have to manage our energy every day. That's why we learn how to prioritize. We learn how to manage time, learn how to focus on things like that. So, to manage your energy, you have to be able to move within a space within your environment that reflects your energy level.
So, when I feel like high energy and very social, I have a place to go where I can be social. If I need to step back, I need to be a little bit more, you know, have some solitude or get some work done. Then I might have a place to focus. They did an amazing job of setting up different spaces where there were different things to do. There were social spaces, activity spaces, and more spaces of solitude.
There were definitely times when I needed to let off some steam because I was clearly anxious. I was getting anxious and overstimulated; similarly, the space that they built for the actual Ted talks was also well-designed. It was an arena format. There were different types of places to sit. There were couches, and there were chairs, there were swivel chairs.
I found immediately that in the first talk in the first session, I gravitated towards the very back of the arena as I do in the back of the bus.
The back of the arena, and they had swivel chairs set up, and then there was a kind of like a bar in front of you, a that you could lean on or put to write on.
That was where I felt the most comfortable, and I spent almost all the sessions back there. Conveniently, it was also the easiest way to escape as well, in case I needed to escape.
I was able to move around back there, which is something, you know, that you can't do when you're beside somebody when you're close in contact with somebody else because often you will you don't. You don't want to interrupt them. You don't want to, you know, be a nuisance, right?
I was able to move around or walk or stand up or, you know, whatever. Whatever was that I needed to do at that moment to feel comfortable. People will sometimes underestimate the profound impact that our environment, our physical environment, has on our capacity to learn, collaborate, and feel comfort as individuals. So, they did that really, really well. So, congrats to them.
Another thing that I thought that they did extremely well, and this is, of course, my opinion for what it's worth, aligned with the design of the space, but was really more about the learning side of things. Most of the learning professionals that I know, they focus on something, not learning preferences. They focus on something called flow, which is the idea that, as I mentioned before, at all moments of the day, we're all managing our energy, and some things motivate us, and some things demotivate us.
This and it's about learning how we learn, how we're motivated and what we're curious about in order to maintain and manage our energy and our drive in a way that increases our flow and our productivity. Basically, I got a little lazy and had to ask ChatGPT. to describe flow for me, for someone who'd never heard of it before, and they mentioned that when experiencing flow, a person is fully absorbed in the task at hand and their performance tends to be at a peak.
They have clear goals, they experience immediate feedback, and they're able to more easily assess their project product, their progress and make adjustments as needed.
There's a balance between challenge and skill. They have a sense of control. They're less self-conscious. Time seems to fly, and activities become more intrinsically rewarding.
The very interesting thing about flow is that it's basically, and this is me now, by the way, not Chad GBT. The very interesting thing about flow is that it is basically impossible to be in a state of flow and a state of anxiety simultaneously by its nature. The concept of flow, or being in a flow state, quote UN quote, allows for a sense of purpose drive focus and control while, on the other hand, anxiety is a sense of a loss of control and the fear of the unknown that creates that physiological and mental response.
The Ted Conference did a phenomenal job of supporting individuals to access and follow a state of flow by allowing each person to experience the event in a completely different way from every other person.
It's however they wanted to experience it. You never felt you had to do the same thing as everyone else because there wasn't. There was obviously some planning. There was some scheduling, but there was lots of buffer around. The scheduling was a very big sandbox.
There were lots of different options, especially for the breakout sessions to follow, you know, whatever you're curious about in terms of the physical space, it aligned with this concept of flow as well, where you can use your energy to its best advantage through the whole process, which was important because it was a marathon, not a Sprint, that is, for sure, and the third thing that I wanted to mention was the people the Ted Brand is extremely strong. People are drawn to it. I was drawn to it. It's a high-trust brand, which is something that we talked about in one of the previous episodes about creating trust in organizations. Ted has done that.
They've done a fabulous job of nurturing trust in their brand, brand consistency their, transparency, honesty and vulnerability. As a brand, they've got quite a democratic nature and willingness to accept feedback and, again, consistency, consistency, consistency.
They demonstrate that over and over again, are they perfect? No, who is? But on the whole, I'm pretty impressed. And I think because of that brand, the people who showed up at the Ted Conference were there to learn. They were there to experience something new and bring together folks that had, you know, such open minds about everything.
Things created this interesting dynamic community where everyone was just so very curious and, you know, interested in whatever it was that you had to say. And it's interesting how, via the environment that they created.
This, you know, this kind of like open concept flow, free flow sort of conference idea. We were able to sort of assemble into little tribes because you'd kind of match and mesh, and you'd end up seeing the same people over and over again. And so, you knew that those were sort of your people. They're on the same wavelength as you.
The thing about a puzzle is that it's more than the sum of its parts. One puzzle piece alone isn't super meaningful, but when you find just the right spot where it belongs, along with the others around it, the outcome is a picture that actually makes sense.
You could also think about a puzzle in the Wu Way sense.
If you've read a little bit about Daoism, you'll understand the context. Effortlessly doing, not doing or allowing the energy to flow naturally like water flowing and filling up space, but the point is you are totally unique. There is literally no one else on earth like you.
No one can do things and see things exactly the same way you do; that's a fact.
At the same time, we ourselves alone are limited to what only one person can achieve. So, I encourage you to think about the puzzle and how to bring each unique person together in a way that is complementary, holistic, and integrative and allows every person to strengthen the people around them and the systems around them.
That’s all for today.
Thanks for listening!
If you like this episode, I'd love to connect with you on https://www.linkedin.com/in/erin-patchell/ or https://www.positivist.ca/.
I'm your host Erin Patchell, and remember, don't stay out of trouble.
