If Alex Keenan is known for anything, it's for knowing how to take the “ick out of public speaking"!
From public speaking at conferences to courtrooms to crowded bars, Alex has learned a thing or ten about authentic audience connection and making public speaking a fun and crucial skill for success.
With a deep understanding of how to bridge gaps between people - and a gift for helping her clients find the strength to confront their fears - Alex helps her clients speak confidently, find the right words, and build a stage presence that is powerfully authentic.
As Alex says weirdos, let's take the "ick out of public speaking and start showing up sauthentically"!
Stay in Touch with Alex:
LinkedIn Profile: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alexandrakeenan/
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YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRIXL11O608vVB9FNQZybdQ
For more on Alex and her services:
Script:
That means two things. It means that you can, you have a lot of leeway to just be yourself and not really worry about what people are saying. It also means that you have to work a lot harder than you think to get noticed and to get people to retain your ideas. And so I think it's a question of, you know, go out there and be who you are and don't stop being who you are and don't stop saying what you have to say.
Welcome to Weirdos in the Workplace, a podcast that celebrates authenticity, transparency, passion, and purpose at work. I'm really happy to have Alex Keenan on the show. Welcome, Alex.
Thank you. I'm so happy to be here.
So Alex takes the ick out of public speaking. She's spoken everywhere from conferences to rooms to crowded bars and learned a thing or two about authentic audience connection. She works with businesses, professionals, and change makers who recognize that public speaking is a crucial tool for their success. And I would say if you're a person who has a message, you have something important that you want to share with the world and that you want to get it out there, but you're a little too afraid to take that first step, this is the perfect podcast episode for you. I'm really excited to chat with you, Alex.
Thank you.
Awesome. Okay. So let's just give you an opportunity to tell everyone about yourself. You know, what is it that has motivated you to, to do this in the first place? Yeah, I think people are really interesting. Like, how do we connect with each other? Or how do we kind of fail to connect with each other? And what's what's going on in that space in between?
So I came through a career change, I used to practice law, which I'll get into that it was it wasn't the right fit for me. But I did learn a lot about how you know how do you show up how do you think on your feet and put your best case forward be persuasive and I combine kind of that background with you know I do comedy so I used to be an improv teacher I've done stand-up and then so there you learn how to be more authentic, how to really engage with a group. And I kind of, I bring these things together. And mostly I work with professionals and business owners on how to promote themselves professionally. But I really think that we need to let go of this idea that professional communication needs to be boring and soulless and robotic. And we can bring who we are into the way that we communicate, the way that we express ourselves and how we, you know, show ourselves to the world. Yeah.
I'm so glad to hear you say that. I mean, and that there's a perfect segue into like, you know, I'm, I'm definitely a weirdo. I can't not be a weirdo. Like if I'm talking into a group of people, it's going to bubble out no matter what I do to try to keep it under wraps. Do you identify as a weirdo at all? I sure do. I sure do. Has that influenced the work that you do, do you think? So I, you know, there are a lot of there are a lot of rules of public speaking and communication that I just, you know, don't worry about it. Don't start with a quote, you know, like don't picture the audience in their underwear. Don't don't obsessive about whether you are using filler words. Filler words are communication. And I think we really need to be strategic.
And I like to be kind of, you know, data driven and analyzing, you know, how do we communicate with each other and what's the impact that it's having? And so sometimes I work with clients. I don't just do public speaking. I also work with people who are trying to be more effective in their workplace communication. And so, for example, sometimes I get women who come in and say, oh, the, you know, the men that I'm in meetings with say I use too much upspeak.
And so I'll start with, OK, here's what upspeak here's why can I swear on here I yes please do and also I don't know what up speak is for someone you know for someone to yeah you know pretend that you're not a professional because you have a certain vocal habit oh you mean like what's it called yeah yeah like when you know like your voice kind of goes up. Oh, yeah. Is there another word for that too? I can't remember.
Yeah, I think there's, there might be another word for that as well. I can't remember, but yeah. Okay. So it's when you're like, I've noticed that actually it's interesting you say that because on my first, if you listen to a lot of my first podcast episodes, it's one of the things that I gave myself feedback on that I've been trying not to do anymore. Is that like, da, da, da, like kind of like ask you like, almost like you're asking a question. Is that what you're talking about? Yeah, exactly. But it's really interesting because there are people who, especially if women are doing it, well, you know, kind of like judge and say, it makes you sound insecure and it, you know, it takes away your credibility. But if you, you know, if you look at the science and the linguistics behind the use of that technique, just to name one, there's a lot of subtlety. And it depends on who is using it and what their position in that relationship is.
And so just kind of flattening it down to this is annoying and it makes you sound insecure is, you know, it's simplistic. Yeah, it's very simplistic. And it kind of flattens out the communication that takes place within that vocal habit. And so, you know, we start with that conversation, but you should not have to change everything that you are just to be accepted in your workplace. But, you know, if it is holding you back, here are some options and you can choose how you go forward with this. Here's how you can train yourself to make a choice about whether you're going to use that or not. And bring that out in whatever way is going to get you the results that you want and allow you to be authentic when you feel you need to be authentic and to adapt when you feel you need to adapt. Yeah. So, oh my goodness. Yeah.
There are so many things that like looking back, especially on the podcast, because when you're podcasting, you don't get a lot in real life, you don't get a lot of opportunities to actually listen to yourself talk over and over and over again, like recorded. Right. I think podcasting and, you know, is one of the opportunities, obviously. And so every week I would listen to, especially when I was in the first season, when I was editing everything by myself and it was constant critique. It's funny because we're, I don't do that to other people, you know, like I do to myself, but how many people are still, I wonder like, what is the judgment? I don't know that we're there yet. I think there's still a lot the judgment? I don't know that we're there yet. I think there's still a lot of judgment out there for the way that we present ourselves professionally. Yeah, I think there absolutely is. I'm sorry. I turned my phone off. Absolutely.
Yeah, there is a lot of judgment in, you know, in many respects. And that's sometimes why people come to me is because they're getting that judgment and people feel absolutely entitled to say, I don't like the way you speak. And I don't think there's, there's an easy answer to that. I think part of it is education. Part of it is normalization. You know, the way that one generation speaks becomes, you know, the norm when, when they grow up. And so it's, you know, it's constantly changing. But I think there is a lot of power in being able to identify, you know, listen to yourself in a recording, say, okay, this is what's happening. And I didn't realize it. What can I do about this if I want to do something about it? Right? Yeah.
And then you have the autonomy to choose. Exactly. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah yeah but I think you were not alone in not liking to listen to it I don't like to listen to myself I'm good now like now that I've done it a hundred times I'm like okay now I like the sound of my own voice and I'm like yeah bring it on yeah good good no it's gotten to the point where I'm like it's too much now I'm like okay Erin you gotta you know relax well and I think it comes from when you're hearing it once in a while what you're hearing clashes with what you actually think you sound like and so it's this weird um you know disparity between your expectations and what you're distorted yeah yeah and if you're used to hearing yourself on recording you're just okay that's what I sound like and you can just move on from that but it takes some time it's true um but you can definitely like my voice has changed you know the I don't even know if it's changed for the better to be honest now that I'm like sometimes I go back to those first episodes and I'm like oh I feel like I feel like my voice was I feel like things were a little more natural back then um and not I don't know maybe I've yeah, putting on too many airs now or something, but whatever, we evolve.
Maybe I'll go, maybe I'll devolve and then that'll be better. But I think I've told you this before about my journey into being able to speak in front of people and that, and you were also, I think, pretty shy growing up. Oh yeah. From what I, yeah. Yeah. We were both big time shy. And so I would love to have a conversation about that because I think a lot of our weirdo followers out there who are listening to this, you know, we're passionate people like weirdos, especially, or the way that I define it, at least, you know, folks who are, have a bit of a chip on their shoulder. Maybe they haven't always felt included.
There's something maybe a little bit different about the way they think or unique about the things that they're interested in. So usually very passionate, right? Like focused and passionate, sometimes hyper-focused on things. Uh, and so having something to say, right. Or something that you want to like an agenda, you've got something, some way you want to change the world usually for the good, I hope. Um, but just feeling blocked on like how to get past that first step, um, for people that are out there who want to take that first step. And they're like, I think I'm motivated to take that first step. What would you suggest, recommend? I think the first thing is, you know, give yourself a break. A lot of people, you know, they fear public speaking. They fear, you know, speaking up and kind of judge themselves for that.
But it's so normal, right? Most of us didn't learn how to do this. for that but it's so normal right most of us didn't learn how to do this we were just kind of thrown into okay you're in class and you need to give this presentation in front of all the other kids and some of them might be bullying you and just go for it and do well and then we get into the work world and it's the same thing get up and talk about your work so you know um we can all we can all silently judge you or at least that's how it feels and you know there will be consequences if you don't do well but we're not going to bother giving you the time to learn it.
And so we, it kind of almost sets people up to fail. So I think, first of all, you know, giving yourself a break and recognizing that the reason it feels so negative might be because we only do it in these situations where we're forced to, and there could be negative consequences. And so one thing that I recommend to people all the time is if you want to get better at this go do something you think is fun you know um like some some people I know um some of my clients some of my friends love Toastmasters and that's terrific for them I quit Toastmasters four times it wasn't fun for me and that's fine it's just a personal thing my thing was improv yeah and it was it was great to just be able to get on stage in front of people and let loose and not worry about what was going to happen because once that scene is done that scene is done and nobody thinks about it again and um and so that was kind of my pathway to be able to just show up and and not worry about how I was being judged for some people it might be you know you want to you want to run your book club or you want to get certified to teach the fitness class that you like taking, right?
Whatever is that thing that's going to get you in front of people and you're excited enough to do it, but that overrides the fear that you have of it. That's your path to overcoming your fear and to starting to enjoy it. Right. Yeah. So you can take like really baby steps, like getting in front. I think my first thing was like corporate training, right? Like going in and internal training first, like training my team, like first a couple of people, then more people. And then, you know, external to the corporation. So like, you know, doing work with clients and getting in front of people and doing stuff like that. And then it was workshops, like public workshops. And then, you know, it got bigger and bigger. But like starting even back before that, before that was sales, honestly, like, when I was like 1213, I couldn't even make a phone call.
Like I was terrified. Like, did you ever go through that? Like? call like I was terrified like did you ever go through that like um yes yeah for sure I couldn't I couldn't even pick up the phone to I'd have to write down a whole script it was like calling my friend to go on a you know go out to the movie like even even something like that yeah it was extreme like I'd literally have to write out a whole script um and then it was literally practice and practice and practice and practice. And then in my 30s, I started in business development, like kind of like thrown into it. And I had a list of people I had to call. And it was like, yeah, it was like cold calling. But the nice thing about cold calling is like, there's no pressure, really, you know, it feels like pressure, but there's no, like, there's nothing, nothing's going to happen if they say no and they won't talk to you and nothing's going to happen if you like bungle up that phone call.
Cause they will never remember you, you know? Yeah. Yeah. They don't know you. They're total strangers. Right. Yeah. That's such a great point. Yeah. So people get a lot of anxiety around cold calls, but I think it's like one of the lowest risk things that you can start on if you just need to practice talking to people. Right. Yeah. Yeah. And you know, there's going to be a certain failure rate. And so it's not personal. No. I mean, maybe it is, but like you're learning, right? Yeah. Like start on like low risk potential client or leads or whatever. Like don't start on your like you know the highest the most important people to talk to exactly yeah yeah yeah anyways yeah so I never like I never really thought about it in those terms but you're absolutely right yeah sales was really helpful and now I feel like I can talk to anyone unless it's certain situations that get my like guard up or whatever and then I'm like back to square one.
So how did you end up in a situation where you, you are terrified to talk on the phone and you're suddenly you're doing cold calls. Like, how did you make, I mean, that was like, there was like probably 12 years in between those two, you know? So it was a long time. Cause I didn't really start, I didn't start in business development until I was like in my early thirties. Um, but even at the beginning of that, like I would have a whole script written out and I would know what I was going to say. And then after like the first thousand cold calls, you know, I could throw the script out and, um, you know, it was just, it was just, my boss was like, I actually wasn't even my boss. It was, I felt like I needed to be useful in a different way. Um, and so I pushed myself to do that because I was like, I want to be like beyond a doubt useful. Right.
And so to, to me, sales is like, you know, every business needs sales. Like you're pretty much always going to have a job if you're a great salesperson. Right. Yeah. You know, so to me becoming like, you know, absolutely without a doubt useful meant like contributing revenue generation. But not everyone goes that way. That was a motivating factor. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, there's a strong desire behind it. Exactly. That's factor. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, there's a strong desire behind it. Exactly. That's key. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And how about for you? What led you to this? Oh, it was a long and winding road. So I am, yeah, I was very shy growing up and it took me a long time to get over that. I mean, I think, so law school did it, I think, but in a really weird way. So in second year, we had to do, it's called a moot. And so it's basically a mock legal argument. So you get your case and you have to come up with, you know, your arguments for or against it and you present it. And they, you know, they had professors, they had upper year students and they had lawyers from the community as the judges. And they would just hammer you with questions. You would get maybe one sentence out and then they would just start asking you questions. And I did do great at this. It was not, you know, it was not my top strength.
And I was still very nervous at that point. And the practitioner, the lawyer who was on my judges panel, heckled like he made fun of me and you just have to stand you just have to stand there and and answer the questions and stay calm and um it was awful it was awful but then you know I got got down from there and sat down and I'm like oh I am not dead I guess it's fine right and um yeah I survived this. And so what's the, what's the worst that anybody could do to me? And then, you know, I practiced law for a while and sometimes you're getting up there and the judge is cranky and they're just not buying what you're trying to sell them. And you just have to, you know, commit and go for it and hope for the best. And sometimes it was, sometimes it was awful. But then there was one day I sat down and, you know, I had it was it was a really challenging day. And I sat down and went, Oh, was that fun? You know, like my heart was beating, but not in a negative way.
Right. You know, fear and excitement are so tightly tied to each other you know like that's why people love horror movies right and sometimes you get to this point where you realize you're you're not experiencing it as fear anymore you're just like you're just amped up yeah and that's when it shifts because then it's not negative anymore it's it's just a thing you do and you can feel good about it that's true that that that definitely happened to to me as well or happens to me pretty much every time I go on stage. It's like I'm terrified and then I settle into kind of like a kind of like alert but like ready state. And then somewhere between the beginning and the end, it's, there's like, it's like, I'm doing the thing. And then at the end, once I've decompressed, it's like, now I'm just excited. Like, when can I do the next one? Let's go. I'm like, yeah, the adrenaline's going, all the good hormones are flooding and everything.
It's like, it's over. You know, do you find you get into that state of flow while you're speaking yeah um but that actually was really difficult for me to learn how to do it and sometimes I'm still I'm struggling to still find the best like hook into that I guess I would say or like you know you've got to like so I find I find storytelling really helps and I know that that's something that I think you teach as well probably is around storytelling yeah as a tactic um there's certain tactics that I've I've learned that that that seem to help trigger that flow state can you talk a little bit about that yeah um where to dive in because there's so much in it yeah I think the biggest part of it is when you start to feel connection with the audience like I'm not performing for people anymore I'm just I'm here I'm doing my thing they're getting something out of it and I find that happens best when I can find a few people in the audience who are they're just into it right you're going to look out at the audience and you're going to have some people who are nodding along. They're going to have some people who are zeroed in on you. You're going to have some people who are looking like this. I'm like, you know, that might just be their face. I, you know, I don't take it personally.
We don't judge. But, you know, so when you find people who are really keyed into what you're saying, and then it's a connection and we're just, you know, I'm just having a one-sided conversation with them or, you know, I really like to be interactive when I can. And so, you know, I'm just having a one-sided conversation with them or, you know, I really like to be interactive when I can. And so, you know, how can I bring them into, you know, to be talking to me? And I find that it, you know, you're interacting with each other in a really deep way. I find for some people movement can really help them with that. So you can use not just body language, but your movement in a space to highlight. So, you know, one technique is if you're kind of comparing and contrasting, you can kind of move over to this space to, you know, compare like before, and then move over to this space when you talk about after. And as you move between those spaces, you're conditioning the audience to think, okay, now she's talking about this, now she's talking about this.
And so you can kind of get the audience into a groove with that, but you can also get yourself into a groove with this. lot of nervous energy on stage and and just being learning how to move strategically she was burning off that nervous energy and she you know it just became yeah I'm like thinking back I'm like that is so me yeah and for the people watching it was just this hypnotic thing and she wasn't just pacing she was moving very purposefully but it was able to kind of meet that need for her to be moving yeah like what I did did recently did a pitch at Invest Ottawa for our other project, the Train to Help project, which we are rebranding soon. And I will release that information shortly. Little tidbit. But I remember I was practicing, we were coming home. I'd almost memorized the whole three minute pitch. And I use a lot of hand motions to help me remember the words, right? And there was this, I was stuck on this one line.
I was like, man, and it's a three minute pitch and they don't give you a second more, right? So you have to literally memorize that whole thing, like word for word for word. And so we were on my way home, Noemi, one of our team members and I were driving home from Collision Conference and literally I was driving from Toronto and then going straight to the Invest Ottawa to do the pitch and I remember you know she's just she's like helping me mime she's literally like miming all of my hand gestures to me and there was one where she was like you know she's doing this and I'm like you know it's just triggering that word for me so and I'm like you gotta stand in front of me in the audience and literally like mime the things with me to try to help me remember this just this one line this these like four words that I couldn't remember for the life of me for some reason because I was exhausted um it just was really funny moment no I love yeah yeah yeah the memory the muscle memory kind of encodes what you want to say and that's why why, you know, you get feedback. Sometimes people will say, oh, you use too many hand gestures. You know, you don't you don't use your hands enough and everyone has their own taste.
So my take is just just do what feels natural because we don't just, you know, we don't just speak with our hands. We think with our hands, right? You're, you know, that message is encoded in the way that you move when you practice it and so if you're certainly forced to you know to keep your hands still when you're used to moving them it's it's harder to think like it's harder to remember what you're trying to say yeah it totally is yeah what other tricks of the trade are uh to get get us into flow get us like locked into yeah oh um well I think one one thing is even before you know even before you start getting familiar with the space that you're in and kind of getting grounded in it so one thing that like most you know professional speakers show up early and just kind of take a look around and get up there in that space and just be there. So you are comfortable and you know, you know where you need to be. You, you, you know how far you can move forward before you fall off the stage and all of this.
And my, my first improv instructor, he taught us this exercise that I absolutely love. And sometimes I do it inside my head, which is, you know, you get into a space and if you're feeling a little bit nervous, okay, it goes like this. My name is Alex Keenan and I own this stage. And when I'm working with clients, if we're working on the nerves, we do some exercises to kind of deconstruct what are the stories that they're telling themselves that are, you know, convincing them that, you know, that this is a bad and scary thing and how can we transform those messages? And then like, we do this, we like out loud with as much swagger as you've got, and you're not just doing it once, you're doing it three times. Oh God. I love it. You're like, become like a whole like WWE announcer. love it you like become like a whole like wwe announcer oh yeah yeah more swagger right that's awesome yeah that's hilarious oh gosh yeah i'm trying to think like what other hacks have i ever employed like i think people sometimes underestimate how much they need to practice i think that's a big one or at least for me i don't know about other people but um i uh i don't think i've ever had anything go well if I haven't practiced enough. No, no, exactly. Yeah. And you need to practice out loud. They get self-conscious because there might be someone in the next room who could hear them. But if you're just reading it to yourself, you're not practicing. No. You need, again, that muscle memory. You need to make that happen. I put sticky notes on the wall with faces drawn on them. So that while I'm practicing, I'm making eye contact with somebody.
Oh, that's a good idea. Yeah. Yeah, really good idea. Actually. Like I've always I found like, I did when it was the disrupt HR. So I can't remember the format. It's like, how many slides 15 slides in five minutes is that right slide every 20 seconds there's a name for that format that I can't remember right now um so there was one that's similar to that is called Pecha Kucha and yeah Pecha Kucha okay yeah there's another one too yeah Pecha Kucha um and that one I that, that was my first like time, like going up and having to memorize something like that, you know? And that one, I remember I, I literally practice in no less than like six different locations. I was like driving all over the world, like practicing because I just wanted to feel comfortable in like any situation. Cause I knew that I had never been there before. It's a weird crowd. It's a weird location. Like I'm, I'm socially anxious. So for me, like practicing in different locations, I think that was really helpful and it went really well. Yeah. Yeah. No, I love that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You really need to, in order to be adaptable to just try it out in different ways in front of different people. Yeah. So how do you help as a coach? Like when you're coming alongside someone and you're like kind of their guide through this, like what, how do you play that role? How does that work? Hmm. So it depends what they need and where they're coming in, usually the first step is addressing, you know, the nerves, the fear, the self-doubt. And we kind of dig into, you know, what's the story that you're telling yourself and how can you rewrite that story?
Because so much of communication, and that includes self-talk, is a habit that you need to, you need to recognize what you're doing. And then you need to be able to You need to recognize what you're doing and then you need to be able to intervene at the right moment in order to make a different choice. And so we work on, you know, the habits of that self-talk. This is all going to go wrong. What if this happens? What if that happens? You know, identify, okay, so if something goes wrong, what are you going to do? Let's make a plan, right? And so then they have a plan. They have, you know, new messages. So when that, you know, what if this bad thing happens? They have, you know, new messages. So when that, you know, what if this bad thing happens, they have, you know, an answer to it. What if this good thing happens? That kind of thing. We own the stage. I work with them on messaging. So a lot of times people come to me and they have something that they are preparing for.
And so we'll work on, you know, what's your message? Who's your audience? What do they need to hear? You know, what are you, what are you trying to accomplish? And how can they help you? And what do they need to hear from you in order to want to help you? What's going to get them excited about helping you? You know, what do they need to know? What do they want to know? What kind of stories will speak to them? And we, you know, we put, we put that together and then we, we work on the delivery and it's, you know, me, you know, we put, we put that together and then we, we work on the delivery and it's, you know, me, you know, they might practice and I'll kind of observe, okay, you know, here, here's what you do really well. Here are the habits that you have, um, that might not be serving you. Here are some practices that I'm going to give you to, you know, to reshape those. We do a lot of, a lot of breathing exercises. Breathing is, is key. we do a lot of a lot of breathing exercises breathing is is key I've gotten into trouble a few times yeah like in breathing when especially when you're like you're like nervous right so you're probably hyperventilating maybe a little bit or at least I noticed that and then it's like you can run out of air really quickly so yeah what how do you how do you help people with that like what's your's your recommendation?
Um, so we, you know, first of all, we do, um, a lot of just, you know, like, um, diaphragmatic breathing, right. Um, getting used to big, deep inhales into, you know, into your diaphragm, not, but you know, deep, deep breath. And so that's, you know, it's a foundation for calming yourself down. First of all, it's a foundation for being able to project your voice. It's a foundation for pacing. Like this is, you know, one of the things that I have worked on and continue to work on because I've always been a really fast talker and I had to train myself to, you know, to speak at a normal human pace. And sometimes when I get excited or nervous, it still comes out. And so, you know, it's doing these different exercises that force you to breathe, that force you to kind of stop and slow down and breathe. And then you're, you know, you're building your lung capacity, you're building your control over your voice. And then, you know, so then we can turn that into, okay, how do you, you know, speak to someone who is five feet in front of you? How do you use that, that voice to speak to someone who's on the other side of the room? How do you use that voice to speak to someone on the other side of the football field, right? So you can control your voice, how it's heard, who it's heard by, how quickly or slowly you go. So you can create, you know, you can create emotions using the speed of your voice.
And yeah, this is just how we, you know, we create a mood and start to influence people based on just how you use your voice. But it starts with being able to control your voice, which starts with being able to control your breath. Right. And the awareness, I guess. Yes. Yeah. Aware awareness is huge yeah yeah okay okay this is awesome I feel like I'm learning a lot thank you for that I'm my pleasure I can nerd out about this all day oh yeah well for sure um the the thing is like it's so important like I don't think people realize like I think public speaking and writing compelling, like writing a compelling anything story, you know, and then turning that into something that you can share with people. I think those are the two most important skill sets probably, or two of the most important skill sets for sure, you know, that you can have period. I mean, if you can have period I mean if you want to sell anything if you want to get your point across if you want to make any change happen you need to be able to convince people to do you know to to understand what you're trying to do and to make it relevant for them right um yeah you can't do that without without those skills no no exactly and um yeah speaking of that you have to be able to be concise about it and this is one of the things that I learned practicing law is you know you might write a 20 page brief for a judge they might read the first line and so you need to be able to summarize your argument in one sentence and I make people do that all the time. Yeah, the presentation, do it to me in one sentence.
And then that's hard. And a lot of people that I work with, they have trouble with rambling. Because, you know, the thoughts are not, you know, fully clarified, or, you know, maybe there's this fear of not being understood. And so we work on how you, you know, narrow this down, how you make it clear and concise because people don't have all day and they're just sitting there going, okay, get to the point, you know, what have you got for me? Yeah, absolutely. Practice, practice, practice, like watch people. If their eyes glaze over, then maybe, you know, maybe try something different. Exactly. Yeah. And so that's where the practice, you know, you can practice what you've got, but then sometimes you have to go off script and that's a whole other skillset that, you know, how do you learn to think more quickly on your feet and how do you, you know, adapt to the unexpected? And that's, you know, another set of skills that I work with people on. Yeah. Like the improv skills almost yeah yeah but like people often think like improv it's like you know oh you're just like winging it or whatever but you're not like people like improv actors they're practicing their craft yeah it is a skill yeah exactly yeah there are principles that you apply to any given situation yeah and lots of pattern recognition as well exactly exactly yeah yeah yeah awesome and yeah I find that really comes in handy like when you know you realize that the audience isn't having it you need to go off script and when uh you're in a Q&A and anything could happen right yes that's true and learning how to like accept constructive feedback like in in the moment as well. I think that's a really, anyways, there's so many things we could talk about. Oh yeah. Uh, I just noticed, I'm noticing the time and we're kind of getting to the time where we start to, you know, think about wrapping up.
Is there anything that you wanted to be like, you know, share with, you know, folks who really want to have their voices heard? Any like final thoughts or inspirational, an inspirational moment? I think that the biggest thing is knowing that people are not observing you as closely as you are observing yourself. There is something called the spotlight effect where, you know, we think that we are being very, very closely observed, everyone else is kind of doing their thing, going about their life and obsessing over how they are being perceived. And so that means two things. It means that you can, you have a lot of leeway to just be yourself, and not really worry about what people are saying. It also means that you have to work a lot harder than you think to get noticed and to get people to retain your ideas. And so I think it's a question of, you know, go out there and be who you are and don't stop being who you are and don't stop saying what you have to say, because that's really, that's what it takes. And I think that, you know, we all have the right to be heard and to be able to exist the way that we are.
Oh, you make me cry. That's beautiful. Thank you so much for joining us, Alex.
It's been such a pleasure.
Don't forget to stay weird, stay wonderful, and don't stay out of trouble!
